


Two Weeks In Paris

by SpencerRemyLvr



Series: Who We Are [3]
Category: Criminal Minds, X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Honeymoon, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-17
Updated: 2014-05-17
Packaged: 2018-01-25 10:21:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1645238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpencerRemyLvr/pseuds/SpencerRemyLvr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just what the title says. The boys spend two weeks in Paris, trying to repair their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The sun was setting low on the horizon as Spencer stepped out onto the balcony. He felt like his head was still spinning from everything that had happened in the past forty eight hours. So many things had happened! Hell, the past _week_ had been one chaotic roller coaster ride. His whole life had been turned upside down and he was having a hard time finding his footing once more. When he’d first been sent to New York to go to that seminar, he’d never imagined just how much his life would change because of it. He had definitely never imagined that almost a week later he would end up standing on the balcony of his hotel room in Paris with the love of his life in the room behind him.

Paris. _Paris_! That alone still had him stunned. When Remy had asked him this morning if he had his passport on him, Spencer had answered that of course he had it, but he’d laughed it off in his head, assuming Remy was just teasing him. He should’ve known better. When Spencer had seen their tickets at the airport, he’d only been able to gape. Remy had laughed and kissed him soundly. “De city of love, cher. It’s de perfect place fo’ us t’ rediscover each other, _non_?”

Leave it to Remy to plan something like this. Especially spur of the moment the way they had. When Spencer had suggested they go somewhere neutral, somewhere they could just work on connecting with one another again, he hadn’t really thought about crossing any oceans to do it. But Remy never did things in half measures. He’d planned all this out perfectly while they’d been apart this morning. While Spencer went to his boss and team and put in his request for that time off he’d been offered before—and Aaron had no problem granting him that time—Remy went to his home and dealt with the people there and with making his plans. Something told Spencer that his partner had quite a few more plans and, though it would’ve surprised his friends, Spencer was perfectly fine with it.

Remy had always enjoyed planning things and taking Spencer places. Not to flaunt his money, and not because he thought he had to buy Spencer. The young genius had thought about it over the years and he had a feeling that Remy’s need to buy things for those he loved stemmed from how little he’d had when he was a child. He knew the feeling of being homeless and alone, with nothing to his name. Then Jean-Luc had come along and Remy had been given a home and family with all the nice things that came with it. Even the little things like a fresh set of pants or a new book had been wonderful. To a young Remy, all those little things had helped to show him just how loved and wanted he was. So now, the adult Remy often showed his affection in the same way, even if he didn’t realize it. He gifted things to those he cared about because that was how it worked for him. It wasn’t a way to buy their affection, but a gesture of his own affection.

There was only one small worry that nagged at Spencer's mind. Remy had always had money back then, true, but it hadn’t been limitless. They’d been apart for so many years, he had no idea what Remy’s financial state was. The first class flight and this amazingly beautiful hotel suggested that the Cajun wasn’t having issues with cash at all. But Spencer didn’t want to strain the man’s finances just for them to enjoy a visit to this beautiful city.

Soft footsteps came from behind Spencer and alerted him to Remy’s coming. His lips quirked slightly at the sound. He knew Remy did that for him. Most of the time Remy moved silently out of sheer habit. He made sure to make sound coming up behind Spencer, though, not wanting to startle him. Spencer kept his back to him and looked out over the slowly darkening sky. He was curious what Remy would do. There was only a moment’s pause when the man reached him and then warm hands settled over Spencer's hips and that long body pressed up against his back. Spencer was proud of himself. He only flinched slightly at Remy’s first touch. Remy must’ve felt it because he loosened his hold on Spencer's hips and made as if to step away. Quickly, Spencer leaned back just enough to put some of his weight against Remy’s chest. Just as he’d known it would, that movement stopped Remy in his tracks and had him holding on once more. Spencer couldn’t bring himself to say the words that would explain his actions. Instead, he let himself lean a little more, silently letting the man know that he trusted him to help hold him up. It was his way of saying that it wasn’t his fault.

Remy took the silent apology. His hands moved off Spencer's hip to rest right over his belt buckle and he cradled the younger man to his chest. Spencer put his hands over Remy’s and just let himself enjoy the embrace.

“Y’ looked like y’ was t’inkin awfully hard out here, cher.” Remy murmured against his ear.

A nice little chill slid down Spencer's spine at the feel of Remy’s breath on his ear. He ignored it, not quite ready to go to that place yet, and turned his attention back to what he’d been thinking about. “I was just marveling at being here. When I suggested a vacation, I never imagined coming _here_.” He worried his lower lip for a moment. “Rem, this trip…”

“Don’t worry about it.” Remy cut him off gently. A kiss was pressed against the side of Spencer's head. “Money aint an issue fo’ me. I could never work again and we’d still be set fo’ a long, long time, cher. Dis trip aint putting me back none, so don’t y’ go worry bout dat. I always wanted t’ bring y’ here. Let’s just enjoy it, _oui_?”

The little bit of tension drained out of Spencer. Remy had the right idea. He would just let himself enjoy this. They were here to reconnect as friends and partners and to figure out where their life was going to go next. He wasn’t going to spoil that with worries that he didn’t have to have. Spencer relaxed again, feeling happy and content as Remy started to sway slightly. The two stood there on the balcony and watched as night stole over the city around them.

* * *

Some things Spencer was discovering were surprisingly easy for him to fall back into. Sleeping with Remy at his side was definitely one of them. The man didn’t pressure him for anything more than the cuddling they did and he never questioned Spencer's bed wear. They slept easily with one another and they woke just as they had always used to, with Spencer buried down underneath Remy’s body. A small part of Spencer had worried back in New York, the first time he and Remy shared a bed at that hotel, that a part of him might panic at waking up to the sensation of having Remy over him. But it seemed that even in sleep he recognized his partner and knew the safety that came with him.

They shared a lazy breakfast together for their first morning here. The hotel that they were staying at was a fancy place and Spencer was content to lie in the plush bed. When the tray they’d ordered was brought up, Remy took it straight into the bedroom and they indulged in breakfast in bed. They talked about little things while they sat there and slowly woke up. Things that might not have seemed important to anyone but each other. Remy told some stories of little things that he’d done over the years and interesting people that he’d met. Spencer told Remy about obtaining his degree in philosophy and about his desire to potentially look into getting another degree. He told Remy about his friends and about his new Godson, delighting in the way that Remy lit up at that news. “We’ll have t’ pick up somet’in fo’ de petit while we’re here. An somet’in fo’ his Mama. Everyone always buys fo’ de kids and never fo’ de parents.”

“That is true. You should see the amount of gifts that Garcia got for Henry.” Laughter tickled in Spencer's throat. Leaning back against the pillows and cradling his mug of coffee in his hands, Spencer let the laughter out as he thought of that stack of gifts he’d seen in JJ’s living room. “Garcia has this tendency to go to the extreme in things. I don’t think she knows how to do anything in small measures. And being Henry’s Godmother, she’ll use that as an easy excuse to give him gifts whenever she wants.”

“She sounds like a great lady.”

“She is. She’s just…” He paused and tried to think of the right words. How did one describe Penelope? “She’s a little hard to describe. You really have to experience her to understand her. She’s bright and funny and she has one of the biggest hearts of anyone I’ve ever met, which is strange to see in our line of work. Usually what we see every day changes a person. When you’re surrounded by darkness and evil every single day, you’re bound to be changed by it. But Garcia,” Tipping his head, Spencer looked down into his coffee, his expression thoughtful. He didn’t notice how intently Remy was watching him. A small smile curved his lips. “It affects her, but she doesn’t let it really change her. She surrounds herself in bright colors and happy things. She jokes that sometimes she needs to take a breath from the crime scene photos on her screen and go think of puppies and kittens and big bright sunflowers. Seeing the violence we see can hurt her and make her cry, yet she never fails to do her job and be there for all of us in her own way. She kind of mothers us all. With Morgan, she flirts, and it makes them happier. With Emily or JJ, they have girl talk, they go shop together, go drink. With Rossi, she’ll sometimes have a favorite drink of his waiting in his office, or stick a new book in his stuff so he has something to distract himself. For Hotch, she’ll talk to him, maybe say a little something to remind him why he does this, or she’ll draw him into talking about his son as a way to lighten things for him. She teases all of us, too, and uses these pet names that either embarrass us or make us laugh. It’s like it’s her way of injecting a little love and humor into all the pain and death. A sort of counterbalance.”

“An what about fo’ y’?” Remy asked, smiling.

Spencer's smile grew as well, though there was a hint of embarrassment on his face. “She likes to tease me excessively because she knows it flusters me. She also seems to, well, to mother me more than most. She brings me lunches sometimes and she likes to bake for me when she thinks I’m in need of cheering up. She talks to me about things others don’t and she’s gone to Comic Con with me.” A memory hit and Spencer laughed softly. His eyes went a little distant as he remembered one time he’d been depressed and hiding in his apartment. It had been just a day or so after what would’ve been his and Remy’s anniversary and he’d just wanted nothing more than to hide in his apartment. But Penelope had showed up at his door. “One time, I was depressed and just sort of hiding out at home for the evening, and she showed up at my apartment. When I opened the door, she was standing there with three big bags bulging with foods and drinks, and she was dressed in full Doctor Who regalia. She marched in, flung a scarf around my neck and told me we were having a marathon. Then she took over my living room. She’d brought everything we needed. Snacks, drinks, even blankets. She had a blanket for her and a Who quilt that she’d made that she gave to me. We stayed up until two in the morning watching the movies she’d brought with her.”

“She sounds like a great lady.”

“She is.”

Their conversation tapered off for a little bit and that comfortable silence surrounded them again. The two finished off their coffee, content to simply be sitting there together, side by side. But when they were done, Remy took the cups and tray and moved them off of the bed. “Why don’t y’ go on and get ready? Take y’r time. Dis is our vacation, so we got all de time in de world.”

Didn’t that just sound nice? No one calling, no one interrupting, no cases or deadlines or anything that absolutely had to be done. Just, them. Spencer couldn’t stop smiling at that thought. Man, he’d smiled more so far on this trip than he had in such a long time. He felt like he was slowly starting to come back to life after years of only being half alive. It was a wonderful, amazing feeling.

Spencer climbed out of bed and gathered up a change of clothes. He had just reached the bathroom door, was taking his first step through it, when Remy’s voice called to him.

“ _Mon amour_.”

“Yes?” Spencer turned in the doorway and looked back at him.

Remy watched him for just a second. The look that was on his face was loving and tender. “I jus’ wanted t’ tell y’, I’m not going nowhere. I won’t leave de room while y’r in dere, I promise.”

It only took a second for understanding to wash over Spencer. He caught the meaning underneath Remy’s words. His first reaction was a flare of panic, quickly squashed down. _Quit it. He’s not asking you to do anything big here. He’s not really asking you to do anything at all! He’s leaving it entirely up to you._ Somehow, that didn’t exactly help any. Spencer nervously licked his lips, dropping his eyes away so he wouldn’t have to see the understanding on Remy’s face. “Okay.” He held a moment longer and then turned and stepped into the bathroom. With hands that shook only slightly, he pushed the bathroom door shut. Then he froze in place, palms resting against the wood door. _Man up_ his mind scolded him. _This trip is supposed to be about reconnecting and about fixing what went wrong between the two of you. That’s going to take steps on both your parts. You can do this!_

Spencer took a deep, shuddering breath and forced himself to turn away from the door. For the first time in almost six years, he climbed into the shower without the bathroom door being locked.

* * *

It was about an hour later that the two men set out from the hotel. They had no real set plans on where they were going to go or what they were going to do, which was a strange feeling for Spencer. He was used to planning things out in detail. Just heading out and going wherever they felt like going was very different to him. “Let’s just wander t’day and see what dere is, _oui_?” Remy had suggested. No plans, no lists of things to do or places to see. No general direction of where they were going to go. When they hit the end of the street, Remy simply looked at Spencer and asked “Left or right?”

Amused, Spencer looked both ways and then back at his partner. “Um, right?”

“Okay.”

And like that, they went right. Spencer had no idea what was ahead of them and, apparently, neither did Remy. They could get lost like this. They could end up somewhere with absolutely nothing to do. Or they could end up somehow in a bad part of town without even realizing it. All of those things ran through Spencer's mind. But as he and Remy headed down the street, fingers twined together, Spencer thought that he could probably get used to it, though. It was worth every mile they walked to be able to feel Remy’s fingers twined around his, or the way that Remy would sometimes wind his hand into the crook of Spencer's arm, or place a hand in the small of his back to lead him somewhere.

There were countless little shops that they passed by. Remy dragged Spencer inside of most of them. In his whole life, Spencer could honestly say he’d never done so much shopping in such a short time. But Remy seemed eager to go just about everywhere and shopping had always been something he loved. It seemed like every store they went to, he found something he had to have, or something that he needed to get for someone else. Spencer only bought a few items. A beautiful shawl that made him think of Penelope and a handmade quilt that he knew his mother would love.

By the time lunch rolled around, Spencer was ready for a break from all the shops. He saw a small corner café just up ahead and tugged on Remy’s arm to get his attention. “Rem, why don’t we go over there and grab a quick bite to eat?”

That caught Remy’s attention. He turned away from the shop window and looked down into Spencer's face. His lips curved slightly at the pleading look he found there. “ _Oui_. A bite t’ eat sounds good, cher.”

Oh, thank God. Spencer breathed out a sigh of relief and followed his partner over to the café. They got themselves a nice table tucked in to the corner and ordered themselves both lunch and coffee. While they were waiting, Remy shifted his bags over to the side, placing them safely between him and the wall where they’d be out of reach of anyone that might pass by. He looked down into one of them and smiled at what he saw inside. He’d shopped for his friends this morning. There were some cigars and a new cigar case for Logan, a beautiful blouse for Jean, a book for Scott. He’d found a gorgeous chess set, too, that he’d had sent to the hotel for him. That would be his gift to the Professor.

When Remy looked up, he found Spencer smiling at him fondly. Seeing that smile had Remy immediately smiling in return. He loved seeing that happy look on Spencer's face. “What’s got y’ smilin’ like dat, _mon amour_?”

“I was simply enjoying watching you.” Spencer said honestly.

Remy’s smile grew just a little devilish. His posture shifted and his expression showed just how pleased he was by Spencer's words. “Oh, well, don’t let me stop y’.”

Laughter bubbled up from Spencer. That was another one of those things that hadn’t changed. Remy still definitely loved to be admired. “I don’t know.” Spencer teased. “I wouldn’t want your head to swell any more than it already is.”

“Why not? Dat sounds like de start t’ a hell of a lot of fun t’ me.” Remy quipped.

It took just a moment for those words to sink in and for Spencer to realize just what Remy was implying. He looked back at his own words and it hit him just how Remy had decided to take them. Spencer's cheeks turned bright red and he hissed out “Remy!” while his partner let out a joyful laugh. Remy reached across the table and caught his hand, drawing it up to press a quick kiss against the knuckles before Spencer yanked it back. “Ah, cher, y’r too easy.”

“Behave yourself. We’re in public!”

Remy arched a brow at him. “So?”

Ugh. Spencer sat back in his chair and shook his head. “Never mind. I don’t know why I bother. You’re absolutely incorrigible.”

“Yep.” Damn him, he sounded _smug_ about it.

Spencer gave up, letting his lips curve even as he was shaking his head. He was saved from any further teasing by their waitress delivering their food. When she was gone again and the two were settling in to their meals, Spencer fished around in his head for a different, safer, topic. He found one easily enough. It was something that he’d been thinking about this morning as they walked. “You know, I’ve watched you shop for your friends this morning and I realized, I don’t really know anything about any of them. At least, beyond what the government knows, and that’s not truly accurate information.”

Cutting his sandwich in half, Remy cast a quick look up through his bangs. “What do y’ want t’ know?”

That was easy. A warm smile curved Spencer's lips. “Tell me about your sister.”

Remy looked up with surprise which quickly melted away underneath a wide grin. “Y’ saw somet’in when y’ met her.”

“We shook hands.” He shrugged one shoulder and flushed a little, but he was still smiling. “She’s very sweet. Though, not as young as what I saw.”

“It’s a long story.” Remy warned him.

“I’ve got nothing but time.”

“Mm. Well, den, sit back, _mon cœur_ , and let me tell y’ how I came t’ meet a lil t’ief dat changed m’ life.”

Through their lunch, Remy spun him the tale of how he met a young Ororo. Spencer listened, fascinated, as Remy described everything to him, which led into telling how he’d come to be a part of the X-Men. It was easy to hear the love in his words as he spoke of his adopted sister. There was no doubt that the woman was someone very special to him. Spencer knew the emotion was returned equally. He’d felt that when he and Ororo had touched. He said as much to Remy when the man had wrapped up his story. “She cares for you just as much as you care for her. I could feel that in the vision. It’s stronger now than it was back then.”

“De feelin’s mutual.” Pushing away his now empty plate, Remy smirked at Spencer. “She liked y’, y’know. Tol’ me dat she thought y’ was nice an sweet.”

Spencer fought not to blush again. Damn the man, he was not going to spend this whole trip with a perpetual blush. Absolutely not. He cleared his throat and pushed away his own plate. “So, um, what’s on the agenda for this afternoon?”

The distraction was obvious, but Remy let it slide with just a smile to mark it. He caught Spencer's hands in his and leaned forward on his arms on the table. “Let’s be tourists fo’ a while.”

“But you’ve been here before.” Spencer pointed out, leaning forward and mirroring Remy’s pose.

“So?” Because they were close and because he could, Remy kissed him. “I aint never been wit’ y’. Now, where y’ wanna go? De Eiffel Tower, or maybe de Louvre?”

That drew a laugh from Spencer. “You want me to go to the Louvre with _you_?”

Remy’s grin grew just a little sharp. He put one hand over his heart in a mock offended pose. “Why, cher! Y’ tryin’ t’ imply somet’in?”

“Who, me? Of course not.” Humor danced in Spencer's eyes. God, he’d forgotten how good it could feel to tease with Remy. It was so easy to do. The man was always so laid back and happy that it just infected those around him. Spencer let that sensation fill him. The two rose from the table and gathered up their bags. Reaching over, Spencer threaded his hand into the crook of Remy’s arm and he gave him the smile that only Remy had ever been able to draw from him. “Let’s go to the Louvre.”

“Y’r wish is m’ command, _mon amour_.”

* * *

Their afternoon in the Louvre was both fascinating and entertaining all at the same time. Spencer was thrilled to walk through there and see all the beauty around him. There was so much history in this one place. He found himself in awe of some of the things he saw more than once. Always one to appreciate art, it was a beautiful place to be and well worth seeing. He would’ve been content to simply wander around and view for hours. Yet his experience there was unlike anyone else’s, he was sure. No one else had the tour guide that he was blessed with. Remy led him through everything, talking almost nonstop in a way that Spencer usually did.

He didn’t just describe what it was they were seeing, either. Oh, no, not Remy. He not only spoke of the artwork around them, he also kept up a running commentary of the security that they passed and the pieces that he would love to take and add to his collection. He had Spencer smothering laughter all through the place with his dry commentary and his mocking of a nearby tour guide who kept getting his facts wrong in his speech. It made the visit entertaining and fun. By the time they left, Spencer felt as if he hadn’t laughed so much in years. Definitely not the experience he thought he’d take away from a place like that.

By mutual agreement, they made their way back to the hotel. Spencer was happy to make his way back into the grand room, which was fancy enough to be considered a vacation all on its own. The first thing he did when he got back in the room was go to the bedroom and pull his shoes off. He left them beside the bed and padded his way back out to the main part of the room where Remy was settling down on the couch. Spencer stared at him and shook his head. In a room made for the rich, Remy should’ve stuck out like a sore thumb in that trench coat and with those old boots up on the coffee table. Yet somehow he seemed to fit right in. It was Spencer who looked out of place here. Slightly awkward in a setting he wasn’t quite used to.

Remy looked up from the couch and his whole expression softened and warmed. “C’mon, _bébé_. Come take a load off.”

When Spencer got close, Remy shifted a little and opened up his arms, the invitation clear. Spencer only debated for a second. He folded down onto the cushion and let Remy pull him in close and wrap him up tight. Spencer ended up with his back pressed up against Remy, legs stretched out right alongside his, and one of Remy’s arms was around his shoulders with his hand dangling down over Spencer's chest. Sighing, Spencer laid his head back against Remy’s shoulder, content. This was perfect. Everything else today had been wonderful, beautiful, but none of it compared to being right here. This was where he wanted to be. This was where he’d wanted to be for years now. A little sigh slipped free as he snuggled back into Remy’s warm embrace. The worries he had, the little fears that he wasn’t quite able to chase away, they faded to the background for now. He pushed back his worry that this wasn’t going to last and his fear that Remy was going to walk away again. For the moment, he just let himself enjoy this. He let himself soak it up. Turning his face slightly, he nuzzled it against Remy’s arm. “I had a really great time this afternoon. It was beautiful there.”

“ _Oui_ , it was.” Remy agreed. Something in his tone suggested that it wasn’t the artwork he was talking about.

Spencer chose to ignore that, though his lips curved slightly with his pleasure at the compliment. He gave another little sigh and let go of everything. The two men stayed there, silently holding on to one another, and Spencer felt himself drift off into sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

The next few days passed by in a whirlwind. It seemed as if the two went everywhere and did everything. They shopped, went sightseeing, exploring Paris together. But they didn’t just play tourist. Sometimes they stayed at the hotel and they talked. Oh, did they talk. One day they spent most of it inside of their hotel room, caught up in the exchange of stories. Remy was describing different missions he’d been on while Spencer talked about various cases he’d worked. By mutual agreement, they kept their conversation light, trying to get to know one another again before they brought any of the more serious things into play. But they only had two weeks here, two weeks to dedicate solely to them, and five days had already gone by. They both knew they needed to start talking about it soon. There were things that needed to be said on both sides, serious topics that needed to be broached, only neither wanted to be the one to do it.

On their fifth night, the choice was taken out of their hands.

Spencer should’ve been prepared for it. He should’ve known that it was going to happen. Every night here so far he had slept deeply and peacefully in Remy’s arms without a single nightmare. That much peace never lasted. The nightmare slipped into Spencer's sleep, taunting him with images of a cold, dark shack and rows of computer screens, the feel of a gun to his head and the loud click as the trigger was pulled on another empty chamber. His body curled in tighter and tighter, pulling away from Remy as the nightmare gripped him in its clutches. His mind was filled with memories of the shovel in his hands and the smell of the dirt around him as he dug his own grave. The feel of the gun in his hands and the loud echo as the gunshot ripped through the night. It was that final gunshot that jolted Spencer up out of the dream. He shot straight up in bed, his heart pounding and his breath catching in his throat.

Remy shot up beside him, a hand held at the ready with a card already partially charged. It only took him a second to realize that there was no threat. He pulled back in the charge and tossed the card down before quickly turning towards Spencer. He could see well enough in the dark to see how Spencer's chest was heaving and how pale his skin had turned. Careful, Remy turned himself the rest of the way towards Spencer, not quite sure if he should reach out or if his touch would even be welcome at the moment. He knew how he used to comfort Spencer from nightmares but his young love’s body language right now was clearly screaming ‘don’t touch me’, so he tried words, first. “Penny, _bébé_ , it’s okay. It was just a dream. Y’r okay.”

The sound of Remy’s voice had a startling effect. Spencer's head snapped towards him and he jerked away from him in one quick move. All Spencer knew at first was that there was someone in bed with him and there was never anyone in bed with him after a nightmare. Then his mind cleared enough that he remembered where he was and who was with him. As soon as he realized it, he reacted in a way that stunned Remy completely. He made a strangled sound low in his throat and launched himself over the short distance and right into Remy’s arms. Just barely did the Cajun get his arms open in enough time to catch him.

Tremors ran over Spencer from head to toe. He tucked his head down and tried to bury himself up against Remy. Right then, all he wanted was to fill his senses with Remy to help chase away the sense memories that were still clinging to him. He breathed in the scent of the man’s body, felt the strong grip that held him, listened to the steady heartbeat. Those sensations slowly washed away the horrible ones that tried to cling to him.

Remy was wrapped tightly around him and was carefully rocking him in the middle of the bed. His voice was a low, soothing murmur in the dark. “Shh, Penny. Y’r safe now .Whatever it is, y’r safe now.”

“S-Sorry.” Spencer stammered out. He slipped his arms down around Remy’s waist and hung on.

“Don’t apologize. Everyone has bad dreams, cher. Even me. Y’ just hold on as long as y’ need t’.”

Thank God for that offer. Spencer doubted he’d be able to let go anytime soon. Right now, Remy was the only anchor that he had. To let go of him would take a lot more strength than he had. For so long he’d dealt with nightmares on his own. It felt so damn good to be able to lean on someone again and have their presence help to chase the fear away. He knew that Remy wouldn’t pester him to talk about it, either. Not if he didn’t want to. Still, Spencer knew he had to give him something. He didn’t think he could actually talk about the case itself, not yet, but he could give him _something_. “I, I dream about the, the cases sometimes. This one…it haunts me, a lot.”

“Do y’ wanna talk about it?” Remy offered gently.

Spencer shook his head vehemently. At the same time, in total contrast to that, he said “I, I died.”

He felt Remy’s arms tighten around him. “Y’ died in y’r dream?”

“No.” Spencer shuddered and tried to push back the smell of burning fish that he swore still lingered in his nose. “On that case. I d-died. A drug overdose and trauma that resulted in a seizure. The Unsub had to perform CPR to bring me back.”

Their rocking froze for a moment. Spencer felt Remy’s body stiffen at his words. “ _Bon Dieu_.”

Here, held close where he’d always felt safe, Spencer knew he had to tell Remy something else. He wasn’t going to get into details about the case and he wasn’t sure when he’d ever be able to. The details were still too fresh. But he did need to tell the most important part. Because if it was going to make Remy run, if the man was going to hate him, better that they found out now instead of later. Spencer braced himself in preparation of potentially being thrust away and he made himself blurt out the most painful part of this whole thing. His voice dropped to a flat sound, tightly controlled in a way that those that knew him knew meant he was controlling his emotions. “I was drugged for days on that case with Dilaudid, cut with a psychedelic. After the case, I stayed addicted for a few months until I finally managed to kick the habit. I’ve been clean since then.”

“Wait a minute, wait a minute.” Remy pulled back from him and Spencer felt his heart start to ache inside. But Remy didn’t let go of him completely. He held on to Spencer's shoulders and looked down at his face. Spencer could barely see with the light from the window, but he knew Remy could see very well in the dark. A faint hint of glowing red looked down at Spencer. “Are y’ tellin’ me y’ shot up? Dat y’ did _Dilaudid_?”

Spencer made himself nod once. “Yes.”

He was grateful that he couldn’t see Remy’s face clearly. Hearing the shock in his tone was bad enough. “ _Mais,_ I never saw not’in like dat in y’r place.”

“I figured that you weren’t around at the time because I made absolutely no attempts to hide it there and I know you wouldn’t have kept quiet if you saw it and you wouldn’t have left it there. I usually left it sitting right out in the open on the dresser in my room.” Spencer admitted.

“When was dis?”

Spencer told him. Though he couldn’t see Remy’s face clear enough to read it, they were touching and that allowed him to really feel the man’s emotions. He felt as they twisted this way and that

“ _Merde_.” Remy sighed out in frustration. “Dat was when I got busted up on a mission. Broke m’ arm and m’ leg. Dey kept me in de damn Med Lab fo’ a while and den confined me to m’ room when I re-broke de arm on accident. No wonder I didn’t see not’in.” Abruptly Remy cut himself off. His hands on Spencer shifted and he once more drew him in until they were plastered together again. He felt Remy’s emotions shift to sorrow and guilt. “ _Désolé,_ Penny. _Je suis désolé_ dat I wasn’t dere fo’ y’ like I shoulda been.”

What could he say to that? Spencer let himself lead with his heart for once. He snuggled back in against Remy’s chest, arms going around his waist once more, and he murmured the words that, to him, meant the most. “You’re here now.” That meant everything to him. Sure, Remy hadn’t been there back then, but there was no point in whining over it. He was here now. He was right here, holding on to Spencer, helping chase away the remnants of the dream with just his presence alone. Spencer kept hold of him as Remy shifted them around and laid them back on the bed once more. This was all he needed right now. This was perfect. Content, he curled into Remy’s body and let their heat chase away the chill inside.

They’d been laying in the darkness for so long that the sudden sound of Remy’s soft voice had Spencer jumping. “It feels like I weren’t never dere when y’ needed it.” Remy murmured achingly. “How is it y’ aint furious wit’ me, _mon amour_?”

Denial sprang instantly to Spencer's lips. Just barely did he manage to catch it. _Honesty. We’re supposed to be being honest with one another, no matter what_. He pushed down the urge to try and soothe Remy and he made himself say the truth. “Sometimes…sometimes I have been.”

He heard Remy’s sharp intake of breath and felt the increase in heartache that told him that his words had hurt. Spencer bit his bottom lip. Maybe they should’ve sat up and looked at one another as they said these things. It just seemed easier to say while resting so comfortably against one another. Here, in the dark, the things that they hadn’t wanted to say before were finally starting to come out.

Remy seemed to feel the same way. He held still, not moving them, not breaking in his gentle stroking of Spencer's back. His voice was a bit thicker when he spoke, though. “Y’ got every right t’ be angry. I hurt y’ after promising t’ be de person dat never would. I always worried dat y’ was gon’ hate me fo’ it.”

“I never hated you.” Spencer made damn sure his voice was steady and clear for that. There was no way he could ever hate Remy. It just wasn’t possible. Be angry, yes. Hate? Never. “I won’t deny that I was angry and hurt. But I never hated you. Not even in those early days.

“Can y’ tell me about it? I need t’ hear it, I t’ink. I need t’ know.”

Well, hell. That was a hard question. Spencer didn’t know if he wanted to talk about it. Thinking of that time of his life was hard for him. He wasn’t proud of who he was at that time. That was one of the lowest moments of his life. Until the Dilaudid, he had considered it the absolute lowest he’d ever been. Could he lie here and tell Remy about it? Spencer unconsciously pressed against Remy as if trying to reassure himself that the man really was there. That the aching feeling of his memories was just that—a memory. Closing his eyes, he turned is face in towards Remy just a little more. It was pressed in there that he was finally able to speak. “It was hard. I, I wasn’t in a good place. Too much at once, I guess. I had nightmares, really bad ones, for three months straight. I slept with that knife you gave me underneath my pillow. It was the only way I felt safe enough to fall asleep. I even started bathing instead of showering because I couldn’t stand having the noise block out any chance I might hear someone coming. I…you’ve seen, I still lock the bathroom door.”

Remy cursed long and low in French.

Quickly, before it could get out of control, Spencer turned his head just enough to press a kiss against Remy’s skin. “That was just the early days, Remy. And that wasn’t all you. Some of it was from, well, you know. But I did get better.”

“ _Je suis désolé,_ Spencer. _Je suis désolé_. I know dat aint enough _mais_ I don’t know what else t’ say.”

“Hey now. None of that.” Spencer pushed himself up on the bed a little so that he could look down at Remy’s face. This was too important for him to just keep lying there. The guilt and pain he felt in Remy was enough to push Spencer past his usual shyness and discomfort. “Listen to me, love. Living in guilt isn’t going to make any of this any better. You cannot spend the rest of your life being eaten up by this. What happened was horrible, yes. But that is our past. You and I need to focus on our present and our future. If we get caught up in the pain of the past, we’re going to be doomed before we even start.” Lifting one hand, he softly stroked it over Remy’s cheek. “I’m not saying you’re not entitled to what you feel. I’m just saying not to let it consume you, okay?”

“ _D’accord, mon amour._ ” Remy agreed quietly. He caught the back of Spencer's neck and pulled him down to kiss him softly, sweetly. When they broke apart, Spencer settled down onto Remy’s shoulder once more, feeling a little more of his tension drain away. Remy’s hand started that soothing stroke on his back again and Spencer smiled, holding on just a little tighter.

* * *

The next morning found the two men sitting on the little balcony of their room, wrapped up in robes over their pajamas and enjoying their breakfast as they watched the sun rise. Neither had gotten much sleep after their midnight revelations, yet they didn’t feel tired this morning. Mostly, they were content. Quite a lot had been discussed in the dark hours of the night and it seemed to have opened up some things in both of them. Brought them out of the little bubble they’d shut themselves inside of. Their problems hadn’t gone away just because they ignored them. They were still there, waiting for them. Now that the door had been opened, all those little things were coming in and making themselves known once more.

Spencer was the one to finally broach one of them. He was curled up in his chair, knees drawn up to his chest to keep warm and his coffee cradled in his hands. He gave an absent thought to the fact that they lately seemed to have quite a few discussions over coffee. Then he dismissed it and made himself bring up the topic he’d been wondering about for the past hour or so. “Have you thought about what we’re going to do once we’re back home?”

Surprise momentarily crossed Remy’s face. He turned himself a little in his chair to better face Spencer instead of facing out towards their view. “A bit. Aint been able t’ come up wit’ not’in, me. Least, not not’in dat don’t involve one of us givin’ up a whole hell of a lot.”

Wind blew at Remy’s hair a little, tossing it around his face, and Spencer gave a moment to appreciate the picture the Cajun made. A smile stretched those sinful lips and Spencer knew he’d been caught staring. For once, he didn’t care. He just smiled right back and kept on talking as if nothing had happened. “I’ve come to the same conclusion. But the work that you do, it’s important, Remy. I won’t ask you to give it up. ”

“And y’ t’ink I’m gonna ask y’ t’ give y’rs up?” Remy arched one eyebrow at him.

Spencer shrugged. He finished the last of his coffee and reached out to set the cup down on the small table. “I wouldn’t be giving mine up, per se. Just, transferring locations. I can work out of the New York field office as easily as I do the Quantico one and I’m almost positive that they’d have some sort of position available for me.” He shrugged one shoulder. “Where and how I work is easier to transport than yours.”

Remy looked completely stunned by his words. “I could come t’ DC. I’m sure dere’s stuff I could do dere.”

But Spencer shook his head. This seemed so obvious to him. How was it that Remy wasn’t seeing it? In the back of his mind, Spencer had been thinking about this ever since he’d first thought that there might be a chance he and Remy could start over again. He’d thought about countless different avenues. There were only a few that seemed likely, but all of them had one thing in common. He was going to have to leave DC. “How safe would it be for you if we stayed in DC, Remy? If I stayed right there at the Bureau? You’d always have to hide who you were. If something happened, if I needed a ride home from work, it would all come with a risk. Why on earth would I subject us to that? Not to mention, I’m constantly out on cases there. It’s one thing I always loved about the job because I hated being home alone. I have a reason now not to be gone so much. I have someone I want to be home for. Finding work to suit my schedule shouldn’t be that hard to do in New York, even if I don’t go to the Bureau. I’d want to start part time anywhere I go, until we get settled in. Then, I guess we’d go from there.

“Y’d work part time?” Remy still seemed stunned. He was just repeating Spencer's words, wide eyes still locked on him.

The wind was starting to get just a little chilly. Sitting up, Spencer gestured at their stuff. “Come on, let’s take this in. I’m getting a bit cold.” He suggested. Rising from his chair, he gathered up some of their stuff and put it on the tray. Then he carried it into the hotel room. As he did, he answered Remy’s question. “Part time work is just one idea. I also thought that maybe I’d go over to the college and see what kind of courses they have. You know I’m always looking to learn new things.”

As he set the tray down on the table near the door, he heard Remy reply “Y’ could teach, if y’ wanted. Y’ got de credentials.”

A snort of humor slipped from Spencer. He turned around and gave Remy an incredulous look. “Are you serious, Remy? I couldn’t teach. Can you imagine me up in front of a class?” That image made him shake his head. He strolled back over to join Remy, who had sunk down onto one end of the couch. “You’ve seen what I’m like when I have to speak to groups. I’d be an atrocious teacher.”

It seemed that Remy had finally moved on from stunned and was actually processing what they were saying. His gaze was much more alert now as he looked at Spencer. “Y’r too hard on y’rself, _bébé_. I t’ink y’d do fine once y’ got into de swing of t’ings. Y’ was a TA a few times back in college. It’d be just like dat. Y’ wouldn’t be talkin’ t’ a bunch of people dat don’t understand y’. Y’d be talkin’ t’ young minds dat are smart and dat could learn from y’. Y’ wouldn’t confuse dem. Y’d challenge dem.”

Waving a hand in the air, Spencer dismissed the thought. “There are countless things I can do. Point is, it’s much easier for me to transplant my work than it would be for you. Plus, I don’t mind. Truly I don’t.”

“What about y’r _amis_?”

“I love them dearly and I will miss them.” There was no way he could deny that. They were almost like family to him; of course he would miss them. “They’re my friends and, yes, they’ve become like family. But you’re, well, you’re my everything. If you needed to relocate to Russia and start a life there, I’d still be right beside you, Cricket. Wherever you are is where I want to be.”

He looked up and saw the shock on Remy’s face. Those beautiful eyes were wide and his mouth was hanging open ever so slightly. Then Spencer watched as that look transformed to one of absolute love and joy. All of a sudden, Remy launched himself from the corner of the couch and Spencer had only a second to blink in surprise before a firm body landed over his and a hard, hot kiss was being pressed against his lips, melting away any thoughts he’d had left. The joy of Remy’s emotions washed over him. Whether from Spencer's minor empathy or Remy’s charm projecting at him, he didn’t know. He didn’t really care. Those joyful emotions wrapped around his insides while Remy wrapped around his outsides. Spencer didn’t even have enough brainpower left to even entertain thoughts of protest. Not that he would’ve. This was Remy at his purest form. The man was one of the most sensual and sexual beings that Spencer had ever met in his life. He lived and thrived on positive touching and it was how he responded and reacted to things as well. With this much honest joy in him, the physical response was almost a necessity. Spencer loved it. He always had.

Somehow he found himself lying back on the couch. How had they shifted from the corner to lying stretched out? He had no idea. He didn’t care, either. His body was heating up with a fire he’d never thought he’d ever feel again. Remy’s lips were hot against his own and Spencer shuddered as he felt teeth bite down on his bottom lip, drawing it in and drawing a moan out at the same time. One of Remy’s hands was laced into his hair and the other one had somehow gotten under Spencer's robe and was resting on his side over his shirt. Spencer's hands were fisted in the front of Remy’s robe, holding him in place, and their legs had twined together somewhere in all this. After so long being alone, so long without this kind of touch, Spencer was almost starved for it. He responded with eager, needy sounds that would embarrass him later on to think of. Remy seemed to feed off them, using mouth and body to draw them from Spencer. His lithe body was twisting and rubbing over Spencer's and his tongue came out, tracing over Spencer's lips, asking for an entrance that was immediately granted.

Spencer's whole body was awash in sensation. When Remy’s lips broke free from his, he gave a soft gasp that turned to a moan when teeth caught the bottom of his ear and gave a light tug.

He had thought he was beyond any kind of rational thought. All he could think about, all he could feel, was the blazing heat of Remy over him, pressing down into him, and he wanted more, more, more. Then Remy’s hand slid down his side and he found skin where Spencer's pajama pants had slid down slightly and his shirt had slid up just the slightest bit. Long fingers curved over the skin of Spencer's hip, right overtop the bite scar, and it was like a bucket of ice water was thrown over the young genius. His whole body went completely and utterly still and his eyes snapped open wide.

Remy felt his reaction. Of course he did. How could he not? His own body froze for a brief moment. Slowly, he lifted his head, eyes seeking out Spencer's. The rest of him stayed still, though. He kept his hand resting lightly on Spencer's hip and the young genius knew that Remy could feel the raised skin of that scar. Spencer had felt it countless times with his own fingers. He knew just what it felt like. Aching, Spencer closed his eyes, unable to stop how his body locked down. Too many emotions swirled around and churned in his stomach.

He felt the hand in his hair move, coming down to stroke over his cheek. The other one stayed on his hip. “Penny.” That hand on his hip stroked slightly, the thumb tracing over part of that scar. “ _Mon cœur._ It’s okay.”

Spencer fought to swallow down the lump in his throat. How could he explain to Remy how _not_ okay it was? Aside from medical staff, no one had ever seen Spencer's scars. He’d kept them hidden from everyone but himself. Even then, he could barely stand to see them, yet at the same time he had a morbid fascination with them. He rarely ever looked at them unless he had to but he knew the feel of them perfectly. He’d lain in bed and ran his fingers over them all countless times, though.

“Will y’ let me see?”

That sudden question set Spencer's heart to racing. Let him see? Remy wanted to _see_ it? Oh, God. Oh, God. Breath caught in Spencer's throat. His heart was pounding so hard he was surprised Remy couldn’t hear it.

His reaction must’ve been easy to see because Remy stroked soothingly at his cheek again and shushed him gently. “Shh, _bébé_. Shh. Y’ don’t got t’ yet. One day, _oui, mais_ not yet. It’s okay. I won’t pressure y’. Shh, Penny. Calm down, it’s okay.” The hand on Spencer's hip gave one last stroke and then lifted upwards. Remy’s body stayed over Spencer's, more of his weight actually pressing down on him now as both of Remy’s hands cupped Spencer's face, thumbs stroking over his cheekbones in a soothing way. Spencer focused on that touch and let it soothe him down. Little by little, his heart slowed and his breathing evened back out, encouraged by Remy’s steady presence.

Finally, Spencer felt himself calm once more. Unfortunately, that left room for the embarrassment and shame to seep in. He kept his eyes closed, not quite able to look up at Remy, but he turned his face into his partner’s hand and kissed lightly against the side of his thumb. He kept his eyes closed as he made himself finally speak. His voice was just a low murmur in the air. “I, I want to, Remy. I do. And I, I will, before we go home. I promise that. I’m just…” Pausing, he let out a slightly shaky breath. “I’m scared.”

“Why, _bébé_?”

Once more, it was time to be brutally honest. Not just with Remy but with himself as well. “I know I wasn’t ever really, I mean I’m not exactly the best, well, you know,” With one hand he let go of Remy’s robe and gestured vaguely towards himself. “And then that happened and it was, it was bad, and now I don’t even like looking at myself in the shower. The thought of, of letting you see, of seeing…” he paused and had to clear his throat to force away the lump. To force himself to finish this. He turned his face in a little more to Remy’s hand and kept his eyes tightly shut. His words turned low and just a little hoarse. “I don’t know if I can stand having you look at me the way I look at myself.”

The reaction to his words wasn’t what he expected. Remy didn’t immediately launch into reassurances as Spencer had thought he would. He let go of Spencer's face with the hand that wasn’t being nuzzled at and he reached down, catching Spencer's wrist. Then he drew that hand inside of his robe and pushed it underneath, under the robe and under his shirt until Spencer's fingers encountered skin. Remy’s grip shifted and pushed Spencer's hand until it slid around to Remy’s back. Spencer splayed his hand out over the skin there as he had once done countless times. “Y’ feel dose?” Remy asked him softly. “Y’ feel dem?”

There was no doubt what Remy was talking about. Spencer's fingers ran over the familiar scars on Remy’s back. Long, thin ones, crisscrossed here and there. Whip marks. The wings tattooed on Remy’s back covered the thin lines so that there was no noticing them unless you really looked close or unless you felt for them. Spencer remembered when Remy told him about them.

“Do y’ t’ink dey make me ugly? Dat I should hide dem or be ashamed of dem?”

“No.” Spencer rasped.

“Dese scars, dey’re a part of who I am. Y’ told me once dat I should wear dem wit’ honor cause dey was a mark of how strong I was an how much I survived.” Letting go of Spencer's wrist, Remy dropped his hand down and rested it once more on the skin of Spencer's hip. He traced his fingers yet again over the scar there. “Y’rs show me just how strong y’ are, Penny.” Fingers shifted and Spencer tensed as they slipped under the hem of his shirt and they were suddenly there on his stomach, tracing over the bottom of those scars. Spencer's breath caught in his throat again. His eyes snapped open and he found himself instantly caught in Remy’s gaze. The red in his eyes was glowing slightly. “Dese show me how much y’ survived. Y’ should listen t’ y’r own words. Y’ told me t’ wear mine wit’ honor. Why should y’ do any less? Dese are a mark of y’r strength, cher. Y’r courage. Dey don’t make y’ ugly. Dey make me marvel at de amazing man I know y’ are.”

Remy didn’t give Spencer a chance to say anything. He drew his hand out and very carefully pulled Spencer's shirt down so that it covered his stomach once more. Then he let go of Spencer's face and shifted the slightest bit, drawing himself downward, and laid himself down like a blanket over top of Spencer with his head coming to rest on Spencer's shoulder. Pressing a kiss against Spencer's collarbone, he snuggled in against him, sighing happily as Spencer reacted on instinct and wrapped his arms around him. “I aint gonna pressure y’, _mon amour_. It’ll happen when it’ll happen. Fo’ now, I’d just like t’ lay wit’ y’ fo’ a while.”

As if Spencer could deny him that. His mind was too busy racing with everything that had just happened. In his usual way, Remy had left him with quite a lot to think about. And lying here with Remy’s weight comfortably stretched over him, giving him that securely pinned feeling that always made him feel safe and content, he let his mind do just that.

* * *

A few hours later, when the sun was fully up and the morning half gone, the two men finally emerged from their room, dressed and ready to see a few more sights. Spencer knew where he wanted to go and it took almost nothing at all for him to convince Remy to take them there. To his amusement, Remy made a few quick phone calls once he knew what Spencer wanted, and by the time they left the hotel room there was a car waiting downstairs to take them where they wanted to go. At any other time Spencer probably would’ve teased Remy a bit about showing off. Today, he was a little too caught up in where they were going. Remy was going to take him for the official tour of Versailles.

When they arrived, they went to meet their tour guide. Remy had booked them on the guided tour. Spencer ignored the others in the group as he looked around him. This was somewhere that he’d always wanted to come to. He practically bounced on his heels as he tried to look all around him while waiting for the tour to start. At his side, Remy chuckled. “Y’ look like a kid in a candy store.” He teased Spencer lightly.

Spencer ignored the teasing entirely in his eagerness to look around. “I’ve always wanted to come here. There’s so much _history_ in this place. Did you know that the earliest mention of the name of Versailles is in a document dated in 1038, in relation to the village of Versailles? In 1575, the seigneury of Versailles was bought by Albert de Gondi, who invited Louis XIII on numerous hunting trips in the forests surrounding Versailles. Louis was so pleased with the location, he ordered the construction of a hunting lodge in 1624.”

A few of the tourists around them were looking at Spencer with surprise as the facts poured from him. Remy grinned at his exuberant partner. “ _Non,_ didn’t know dat, me.”

“The original small château was designed by Philibert Le Roy and it was constructed of stone and red brick with a based roof. Eight years later, Louis obtained the seigneury of Versailles from the Gondi family and began to make enlargements to the château. Today, the palace is 51,000 square meters, has 2,153 windows, 67 staircases, and 1,976 acres of gardens. The garden has 200,000 trees, 50 fountains with 620 jets of water, and 210,000 flowers planted every year.”

“It sounds like you all already have your own tour guide.” A woman called out to them as she walked up to the group. She was a pretty woman with dark curling hair and a warm, easy smile. She turned that smile on Spencer, who was so caught up in looking around him that he didn’t even seem to mind the gentle teasing she sent his way. “You’re quite knowledgeable. Are you a scholar, then?”

“Mm, no. I’ve just read a few books.” Spencer answered absently.

Humor curved Remy’s lips. He resisted the urge to laugh out loud. This was going to be an interesting experience. Maybe he should’ve arranged for them to have a tour without a guide. He should’ve thought about the fact that Spencer would act as enough of a guide for them both. But this was the tour that was available when he called and it had technically been full already. It had taken a bit of sweet talking for him to get them a part of this at all. But he’d known Spencer would be too excited to stand around in lines and wait to get in. He would’ve driven Remy up the wall while they waited. This was much better and much, much more amusing.

Their tour was as amazing as advertised. The palace itself and the surrounding grounds were absolutely beautiful. Remy enjoyed walking through a part of history and seeing the beauty around him. It was made even more beautiful by the open and honest enthusiasm of the man walking with him. Spencer viewed it all with such excitement and joy that it was hard not to be infected by it. Even the others in their group seemed to be caught up in it. They were also slightly stunned by just how much information Spencer had. He didn’t interrupt their tour guide—well, not more than twice. For the most part, he kept his commentary quiet until she was done talking. Then he regaled Remy with the facts that were tumbling around in that amazing head of his. A few times, Remy noted the other tourists actually inching closer to listen in as Spencer spouted off his latest bit of information.

When they reached the Hall of Mirrors, Remy watched with amusement as their guide, who had introduced herself as Terri, started to speak before stopping herself. She turned to look at Spencer, who was staring around with wide eyes. “ _Monsieur_ , perhaps you might share with us your knowledge of this room. I have my facts, but I find myself curious as to what you might know. Would you mind sharing with us?”

Remy didn’t even bother smothering his wide grin. He watched Spencer straighten and light up and he let go of his partner’s hand in preparation, knowing just how Spencer could get his hands to moving when he really got into a subject.

“The Hall of Mirrors began in 1678 and was the principal and most remarkable feature of the third building campaign of the Palace of Versailles.” Spencer started out. Sure enough, his hand got into what he was saying, gesturing around him as he warmed to his subject and to the rapt audience watching him. “To provide for the Hall of Mirrors as well as the _salon de la guerre_ and the _salon de la paix_ , which connect the grand _appartement du roi_ with the grand _appartement de la reine_ , architect Jules Hardouin Mansart seized three rooms from each apartment as well as the terrace that separated the two apartments. The chief feature of this hall is, of course, the seventeen mirror-clad arches that reflect the seventeen arcaded windows that overlook the gardens. Each arch contains twenty-one mirrors, which makes for a total complement of 357 used in the decoration of the _galerie des glaces_. The arches themselves are fixed between marble pilasters. Many of the other attributes of the Hall of Mirrors were lost to war for financial purposes, such as the silver table pieces and _guéridons_ , which were melted by order of Louis XIV in 1689 to finance the War of the League of Augsburg.”

Terri was watching him with a grin that had grown even more through his speech. When he cut off, she chuckled. “Are you sure you’re not a scholar?”

“He’s more of one dan he admits to.” Remy interjected. He cast a fond look over at Spencer and caught hold of his hand, giving him a little tug to bring him back. “Aint dat right, Dr. Reid?” He stressed the title, finally drawing out one of those blushes that he loved so much. As much as he knew Spencer hated how easily he blushed, Remy loved it. To him, it showed the sweetness in his lover more clearly than anything.

Spencer's blush deepened as he looked around him and finally seemed to realize just how much attention he’d garnered. He’d been so caught up before that he hadn’t really been paying attention to the fact that he’d essentially been acting as tour guide/instructor to this group. “My apologies, ma’am. I didn’t mean to commandeer your tour. I just, I like to learn and I have a tendency to think that everyone wants to share in the knowledge I have.”

“I believe I was right, doctor. You have the heart of a scholar.” With that compliment, Terri turned her attention back to the tour and led them forward.

Slightly more subdued, Spencer stayed at Remy’s side, casting him a small glare. “Why did you let me ramble like that?” He grumbled quietly, keeping his voice pitched low so the others wouldn’t hear.

Remy couldn’t help it; he chuckled. “Y’ act like I could stop y’. What was I supposed t’ do, put m’ hand over y’r mouth?”

“You could’ve done _something_. Instead, you encouraged me!”

“I keep tellin’ y’, _mon amour_ , y’ a natural born teacher. Y’ get nervous talkin’ t’ crowds, I know, _mais_ once y’ get goin’, y’ got so much knowledge t’ share. An I like learnin’, me. Why wouldn’t I encourage y’ t’ teach me?” The crowd had stopped at the next place and Remy took advantage of the moment to dip down and steal a quick kiss. “ _Je t’aime_ , Spencer. Jus’ de way y’ are.”

That blush came back to Spencer's cheeks, though more from pleasure this time than embarrassment. He leaned in against Remy and let go of his hand to slide an arm around his waist. Remy answered that by putting his arm around Spencer's shoulders. He felt Spencer's head settle against his shoulder and heard a soft “I love you too, Remy.”

Happy and content, Remy turned his attention back to their tour. Today was proving to be a pretty good day.

* * *

The rest of the tour was finished without any great speeches on Spencer's part. He settled in at Remy’s side and seemed content to watch, only interjecting commentary here and there. But when the two hour tour was done, the young couple was pleasantly surprised when a few members of the group suggested getting together back in Paris to meet up for some lunch. Most of them were sharing transportation back there. Remy and Spencer both agreed and they all split up to head back, meeting up at the specified restaurant. Their lunch was both fun and entertaining. There were ten of them total, including Spencer and Remy, and there were three other couples in the group.

Here was where Remy was in his element. He drew their stories out of the people, asking them about their vacation, prompting them to tell more. Ron and Linda, a retired couple from St. Louis, were here as one stop on their ‘retirement tour of the world’. Susie and Lisa were here as a romantic weekend getaway. Christopher was a young artist and he had come here as many others before him to try and be inspired by the beauty of Paris.

It felt good to sit and simply talk with people. To be able to sit there with Spencer at his side and talk with a group of people that were entertaining, intelligent, and who didn’t have a single problem with how much the two young men touched one another. By the time the group finally broke up, the afternoon had started to wear away and their meal had long since been consumed.

“What should we do next?” Spencer asked as they headed away from the restaurant after exchanging farewells with the others.

Remy slipped his arm around Spencer's shoulders and hugged him in close. “Whatever y’ want, cher. Dere anywhere else dat y’ want t’ see?”

He never got the chance to answer. Just as they were coming around the corner, a small body was doing the same from the opposite direction and ran straight into them. Spencer just barely managed to catch her and keep them both from falling. His hand brushed against the girl’s bare arm and that tingle hit the base of his skull before everything washed out underneath his vision. It lasted only moments. When it cleared, he opened his eyes to find that the men he’d just seen in his vision were now racing up on them. The young girl he’d caught was clinging to him. “Help me!” She begged them both, looking from one to the other. “Please, help me!”

Spencer pulled her in close and exchanged a look with Remy. “We can’t let them get her.”

Remy didn’t even hesitate. He reached underneath his trench and pulled out his Bo, quickly extending it. “Get her outta here.” He ordered Spencer sharply. The men were close and Remy didn’t bother to wait for them to attack first. There were six of them and he moved in quickly to try and disable one before they could attack him. His Bo sliced through the air and Spencer heard the first blow connect. Instinct demanded he go over there and help his partner. It felt all sorts of wrong to just run off and leave Remy there to defend himself, even if he knew the man was perfectly capable. Remy saw him hesitating and called out a sharp “Go!” as he twisted and swung around to meet the next attacker.

Grasping the girl’s hand, Spencer spun around and took off down the road. He was grateful that the girl didn’t seem inclined to protest at all. She clutched his hand tightly and ran easily beside him. Spencer tried to pull up a quick mental map of the area they were in. They’d walked around here a few days ago and he thought he remembered most of it. If he was right, there was a place nearby that would work to hide out in. Spencer ran through a nearby alley, cutting out into a crowd on the other side and using them as cover to move across the street and through yet another alley. The girl ran with him, following as he led her up a few more blocks and then right. There, on the corner, was one of the café’s that he and Remy had visited the other day. He quickly ducked in with her through the crowd that was standing outside. Luckily, they were in a lunchtime rush. That provided them great cover. A bit of money in the right hand got them bumped past a few people and taken to a discreet table tucked into a back corner. It was a seat that would allow Spencer to watch around them while keeping them pretty well out of sight.

He and the girl slid in on opposite sides of the booth. Seated, he got his first real look at her. The girl looked like she was no more than twelve years old, at the most. She was a tiny thing, slender and short. Her head hadn’t even reached his shoulder. Judging by the build of her face and her complexion, he was guessing she was Oriental in heritage. Dark eyes watched him cautiously, hidden slightly by loose bangs. The rest of her black hair was pulled back into a messy bun at the nape of her neck. She was dressed in what Spencer thought might be a punk sort of style. Flat black boots that came up to just below her knees, black tights and jean shorts, a black tank top, and a neon pink denim vest decorated with silver spikes. She didn’t have the look of a homeless girl to her, but from what he’d felt in his vision, he was pretty sure that’s what she was.

His assessment of her took only a moment. It gave them both a chance to catch their breath as well. When a waitress came over to them, Spencer placed an order for three sodas. Then he turned to the girl across from him. First things first, “Are you hurt?”

She shook her head quickly. “No. I’m a fast runner. I got away before they could do more than grab at my arm.”

Thank God for that. Spencer relaxed ever so slightly. One fear was off the checklist. He tried to make his voice gentle, calling on years of experience at the BAU with speaking with victims. “I’m Spencer and my partner back there is Remy. Can you tell me your name?”

She hesitated for only a second before answering. “June.” She offered no last name.

“Good, that’s good. Can you tell me what’s going on, June? Who were those men back there?” He knew what he’d seen but he wanted to hear what she had to say. He knew he wasn’t infallible and there were times that he didn’t notice every detail. Sometimes those little things he missed proved to be very important. However, his question definitely set her on edge. She gave him a hesitant look with just a hint of worry to it. Realizing her dilemma, Spencer tried to set her at ease a little. “If it helps you feel better about telling your story, both my partner and I are mutants. You have nothing to fear from us on that score.”

That did seem to help. June slumped suddenly and her expression turned painful. “I didn’t realize they were anywhere near me!” She exclaimed, her voice cracking slightly. “If I’d known, I would’ve been more careful!”

“They saw you use your powers, didn’t they?” Spencer asked gently.

Tears filled her dark eyes. She dropped her gaze down to her lap. “I, I was just practicing. I’ve got this green energy stuff I can make. It’s kind of like being telekinetic, just, I can see it, you know? An I was just practicing with it when they saw me. They…they grabbed me and tried to tell me I was coming with them. I got free and I, I ran…” Wide eyes lifted to him and there was both fear and panic there. “I’m so sorry. I got you and your friend mixed up in this crap.”

Their conversation broke long enough for the waitress to deliver their drinks. June took advantage of the moment to discreetly turn and wipe her eyes. When the woman was gone, Spencer smiled reassuringly at June. “Don’t worry about it. We’re glad to help.”

She didn’t look quite convinced. “But your friend…”

“Needed the exercise.” Spencer quipped.

His calm seemed to stun her. She froze, holding her straw just above her glass.  “Are you kidding me? There were like, _six_ of them and just _one_ of him. They’re gonna slaughter him!”

A hint of a smile touched Spencer’s lips. “Trust me. He’ll be perfectly fine.”

“Y’ got a lot of faith in me, cher.” Remy’s voice echoed around them as the thief slipped down at a seat beside Spencer.

Though June jumped, Spencer smiled and tipped his head towards his partner. Despite the annoyance he still felt with the man, he was glad to see him and he let that show in his eyes. “I have complete faith in you and your skills.”

“Mm.” Remy made a little pleased sound in his throat and dipped his head in to take a hard, fast kiss. When they broke apart, he flashed a smile over at the girl. “I see y’all got us drinks. We should take a moment and enjoy dem an den slip on outta here. I aint sure if dem goons got backup dat might come fo’ em.”

“It’s a possibility.” Spencer admitted. He exchanged another speaking glance with Remy, letting him know silently that he’d seen something and that they should be on alert. “What about the others?”

Picking up the third glass off the table, Remy flashed a quick grin towards June. “Dey aint gonna be buggin’ y’ no more, petit. Last I saw, de cops was pickin’ em up.”

“Relax. You’re safe.” Spencer said gently. He debated for a second before deciding to be cautious with his next words. He knew the answer to what he was fishing for, but he also knew that not many people liked to know that stuff about them had been basically plucked from their head. Spencer had become an expert over the years at asking leading or probing questions that helped cover him when he discovered something by his powers, yet needed them to confirm it with their words. He used that skill now. “Finish your drink and we can take you home.”

A light flush built in the girl’s cheeks. She dropped her gaze again and took a moment to drink off her glass. Remy cast a quick look at Spencer while June wasn’t looking, asking a question with a cock of his head. Spencer nodded and Remy grimaced. He quickly smoothed his expression out and sat forward slightly, resting his arms on the table. His voice lowered to that gentle, concerned tone that Spencer recognized and that he knew, personally, worked very well at setting someone at ease. “Where are y’r parents, petit?”

For a second they weren’t sure if she was going to answer. She never lifted her gaze up from her glass. But she finally spoke, hesitant at first but turning almost defiant by the end as if daring them to say something about it. “My parents died two years ago. I was sent here to live with my Uncle, but he left about six months ago and told me he didn’t want a mutant niece and I was on my own. I’ve been doing just fine, too. Until today.”

Well, hell. Spencer winced. How could people be so cruel? How could anyone treat their family that way? It never failed to baffle him. He just didn’t understand why people would treat someone they were supposed to love in such a horrible way.

“I know some people, not too far from here. Dey got a place fo’ kids like y’.” Remy said carefully, watching her closely as he spoke. “Dey take in young mutants, help dem get control. Get dem some education. Dey give em a home, too. A place t’ be safe.”

“I don’t need help!” June insisted. But Spencer saw the interest in her eyes

Remy saw it too. “Everyone needs help, petit. I lived on de streets when I was little, till a great man found me an took me home. He knew dat I was young an dat I needed a home, an he gave me one. Y’r young, petit, and y’ need a home. Dese people, dey can give it t’ y’. Dey’re good people, dere.”

The indecision on her face was obvious. Spencer could see the battle between the part of her that had learned to survive on her own and the part of her that was still enough of a child to see the appeal in letting adults take control once more. That was a feeling that Spencer knew very well. How many times had he battled between the child in him and the adult he’d been forced to become far too early? He watched it play out on her face and he could see her looking them over, assessing them, trying to read their intentions. They both waited patiently. But after a long moment, some of her tension faded away and Spencer knew what her decision was even before she nodded at them. The child in her won out. With a faith and trust that only the young can manage, she put herself in their hands. Neither man treated that lightly. They exchanged one more look before Remy reached over and patted her hand. His voice was gentle when he told her “Let’s go back t’ de hotel. I’ll give m’ friends a call an get em on de way out here.”

June nodded her agreement. She rose with them, looking suddenly tired, and allowed them to lead her out of the café. Spencer watched her as she walked with them and he was extremely grateful that they had found her. While she had some of the caution of a kid on the streets, she was far too trusting. She had trusted them so quickly. That was dangerous. Not everyone was as open and honest as they were. If she had been this trusting with the wrong people, it could’ve ended very, very badly for her.


	3. Chapter 3

As Remy finished his call and closed his cell phone, he snuck a look out of the bedroom and towards the main part of the room. Through the doors, he caught a glimpse of the two figures sitting out on the patio. One was reclined back with a cup of coffee while the other figure was up at the table, happily eating the plate of food there. Remy had ordered food when they arrived, before he did anything else. Though the two men had eaten earlier, they had both been in agreement on feeding the young girl. It seemed to have been a smart plan. She was devouring everything that they put in front of her. Remy paused for a minute and cocked his head, listening to the low hum of Spencer's voice. He couldn’t help but smile when he realized what his partner was saying. Spencer was giving the girl a rundown on some of the local history. To make matters even more amusing, it looked like June was actually interested, her attention fixed solely on him as he rambled.

One of these days he was going to get Spencer to see just how natural of a teacher he was. If the man could just get past his initial nervousness, he would be one of those teachers that students would love. One that was so full of information and who wasn’t bothered by questions. He had the patience of a saint when it came to getting people to understand something. Remy knew that personally. He’d been instructed by Spencer countless times on things. The man never failed to find a way to make sure that Remy understood him, even if it did take a bit, and he never laughed at questions that, to him, probably seemed simple. _You just want him to teach because it’s safer_ Remy’s mind taunted him. He gave a sort of mental shrug in response. Though that wasn’t the only reason, he wasn’t afraid to admit that it did factor in. No matter that he knew Spencer had been taking care of himself as an agent for years now. Remy couldn’t help but want to find a way for the man to be safe.

Just as Remy came out of the bedroom and into the main room of the suite, he heard June’s soft voice say “I’m so sorry I got you guys mixed up in this.”

Spencer's reply was laced with a relaxed good humor. “It’s no problem at all, June. Trust me, you’ve probably made Remy’s day. It’s been at least a week since he’s been able to fight with someone. If you hadn’t provided him with this, he would’ve most likely started a fight with some innocent person who made the mistake of brushing up against me.”

“I aint dat bad!” Remy scolded him as he strolled out to join them.

Wisely, Spencer said nothing in reply to that. He just smiled and rolled his eyes, making June smother a giggle behind her hand. The two were still trying not to laugh when Remy leaned against the patio railing, opting to rest there since there were no more chairs. He took one look at them and gave a rueful shake of his head as he lit a cigarette. “Whatever, y’ lunatics. Giggle all y’ want.”

“Thank you for your permission.” Spencer said dryly.

Remy wrinkled his nose at him before sticking his tongue out. He curbed his urge to really lounge back against the railing, trying to keep his pose a little more controlled in deference to the minor in their presence. “I got ahold of m’ friend Georgie and he said dat he’ll send someone on over. Should take a couple hours at de most t’ get here. Dey’re flyin’.”

“They connected to your friends back home?” Spencer asked.

Remy nodded. “ _Oui_. De London branch, so t’ speak.”

That relaxed Spencer. He’d trusted that whoever Remy’s friends were, they would be good people to watch out for her, but it reassured him to know that they were connected to the X-Men. A group like that would be well versed in caring for a young mutant and they had to be good people or else they wouldn’t have any kind of affiliation with the group at all.

A few hours to wait meant that they had a little time to kill. Remy settled in with his cigarette and watched contentedly as the other two fell back into their previous conversation. It seemed that June had fully decided that the two of them were safe. She opened up to them, chatting away with them about pretty much anything and everything. They discovered that there was a very sharp, bright mind in there. Bright enough that Spencer thought to himself that they should mention it to the people picking her up. He was almost positive that the young girl would test out with an IQ quite a bit higher than one her age should have.

The few hours passed rather quickly. Remy spent a bit of that time answering June’s questions about the school she was going to and what the people there were like. He reassured her about the safety there and told her stories about some of the people he knew there in hopes that it would help make things easier for her. It did the trick. By the time the people showed up to pick her up, she was much more at ease about the whole thing.

Spencer found himself watching her as she greeted the people picking her up and Remy took care of introductions. Though Spencer knew this was safe and he knew she was going to a good place, he couldn’t help but worry. Somehow this young girl had really gotten under his skin over the past few hours. When she came over to him to say goodbye, he couldn’t help himself. He pulled out his wallet and drew out one of the rarely used cards that he kept in there and he held it out to her. “Here, this has my information on it. The top number there is my work number and that one’s not going to work. But the bottom number is my cell and I always have that on me. You need anything, you feel free to call me.”

Taking the card from him, June slipped it down into her pocket and smiled up at him. “Thanks, Spencer.” She surprised him when she threw herself forward, arms wrapping around his neck. He held frozen for a moment before he wrapped hesitant arms around her in a brief hug. He looked so flustered when she finally pulled away that she could only grin at him. She moved to Remy next, throwing herself at him as well. He wasn’t flustered in the least. He just caught her up in a tight hug that lifted her feet of the ground. She let out a warm laugh. “Thank you too, Remy.”

“Y’ take care, petit.”  He told her. Turning his head in, he spoke in a low murmur for her ears alone. “Anyt’ing happens, y’ use dat card he gave y’. We’ll be here faster dan y’ t’ink.”

“Promise?”

“Y’ got m’ word.”

She held on for one moment longer and then he was setting her on her feet again and she was heading out of the room with Remy’s friends. In just moments the door was shutting behind them and quiet fell over the room. Remy stared at the shut door and felt his lips curve a little. “She’s a sweet t’ing, aint she? I’m glad we could help her.”

“Me too.” Spencer echoed.

“At least we know dem _connards_ aint gon’ get t’ her. Dey aint gon’ be goin’ nowhere fo’ a while. I don’t t’ink dem police was too happy wit’ dem.”

Hearing those words drew Spencer's mind back to earlier and he felt a stab of his previous annoyance swell up in him. For a second he debated pushing it down, not wanting to cause any trouble. But it grew enough that he couldn’t quite help himself. Still, first, he couldn’t help but check on Remy, asking “You’re okay, right? You never said and I just assumed that you weren’t hurt at all back there.”

“ _Non, mon amour_. I’m fine.” Remy reassured him.

“Good.” That allowed Spencer's temper to take the forefront. Now that he knew Remy wasn’t hurt, he didn’t have to worry. To Remy’s utter shock, Spencer put a hand in the center of his chest and shoved him back a full step. He stepped up after him, that hand lifting once more until a finger was pointing right at Remy’s face. “Let me make myself clear, then. You ever _order_ me to leave you like that again and you and I are going to have serious words, Remy Etienne LeBeau. I may not be a fighter like you, but I am an adult and I’ve been handling myself for years without your high handed attempts at protection.”

Temper sparked temper and Remy’s eyes narrowed down at him. “Now, just a damn minute…”

Spencer sliced his hand in the air between them and cut off anything Remy had been about to say. “Don’t. Don’t make excuses. And don’t you dare try and tell me that you did it solely because it was the smart play to make. If that was all that it was, I wouldn’t protest. I know how to take orders, Remy. I’ve served on a team for years and I know how to play to each person’s advantage. I know what my skills are and what they aren’t. You look me in the eyes and tell me you told me to run because you assessed the situation and decided it was the smart course to take, and I will let all of this go right here and now.”

It looked for a moment like Remy was going to. He opened his mouth like he was going to say something and his eyes were heated. Then he snapped his jaw shut and stayed silent. He couldn’t say it. They both knew it wouldn’t be true.

Hurt mixed with the temper on Spencer's face. “That’s what I thought.” He took a full step back, hands dropping down to his sides. “You sent me away to protect me because you thought I couldn’t handle it. Because, despite the years and despite my training, you still look at me as the awkward geek who can’t even begin to defend himself.”

“Spencer,” The temper in Remy’s eyes changed at those bitter words. It was mixed with worry now. “Cher, it aint like dat. I wasn’t t’inkin of t’ings like dat. All I was t’inkin of was keepin’ y’ safe.”

Spencer lifted one hand and wiped it over his face. “I know. I know.” He felt exhausted all of a sudden. Pushing his hair back from his face, he sighed. Temper still filled him and he knew he needed to step back before he ended up saying something he regretted. He and temper never mixed well together. The last thing he wanted was to end up saying something hurtful to Remy that he wouldn’t be able to take back. “Listen, I’m just wound up right now, okay? I think I’m going to just go take a walk and unwind a little. I’m sure I’m just overreacting to this. I’m going to go and walk for a bit and I’ll be back once I clear my head some.”

“So y’r just gon’ run away?” Remy demanded. “Y’ seem t’ make a habit of dat, lately.”

The truth of that cut sharply at Spencer. “I learned from the best.” The harsh reply slipped out before he could stop it and Spencer hated himself a little when he saw Remy actually flinch back from his words. Before they could say anything else to hurt one another, Spencer was across the room and heading out the door. On the off chance that Remy would come after him, he bypassed the elevator and headed to the stairs. He could use the exercise, anyways.

Spencer didn’t really pay any attention to where he was walking once he left the hotel. He just let his feet carry him. It was a habit he’d always had when he was upset. Something about the act of walking helped him to clear out his head a little. Whenever he got upset enough that he couldn’t quite think straight, or when he began to get that slightly claustrophobic feeling when emotions ran high, he would head out on a walk with no true destination. He’d just walk and walk until he’d either calmed down or his feet were too tired to keep carrying him around. Sometimes it led him to a specific place and other times he’d find himself looping back around to where he started.

Today, he found himself a few streets down from the hotel at a small restaurant. After only a second of debate he went inside. Minutes later he was seated in a back booth with a cup of coffee in his hands. Already he could feel his temper fading away. In its place came embarrassment. Man, he’d completely overreacted back there. Why on earth had he gotten upset over Remy trying to look out for him? The man had always done that. It was like a part of his very DNA. He protected people he cared about. Okay, maybe he shouldn’t have been so quick to send Spencer away. But even if he had stopped to think about it, the end result would’ve been the same. They both knew that Spencer wasn’t a fighter. His team back at the BAU knew that, too. That was why they kept him out of that. Yes, he could use a gun if he had to. But he wasn’t one to tackle Unsub’s or kick down doors like Derek. He wasn’t fast at chasing them down like Emily could be. His skill was his mind.

Jason had once told him that the greatest weapon he’d ever have was the profile. Those were words he’d taken to heart. He used the profile as a weapon when he had to. He could take it and use it to talk to the Unsub. Talk him up or talk him down as the situation called for. That was where Spencer's skills shone; in the mental aspect of things. But physically? He was far, far from talented there. If anything, he was a liability. That word made him wince. Gee, what a great thing to be. _Good to know where I stand on things._ He looked down into his coffee cup and sighed. Remy had been right to send him on with June. He wouldn’t have been able to help Remy at all.

The sound of feet near the table drew Spencer's attention up in just enough time to watch as Remy slipped into the booth, taking the spot right across from him. Through a screen of bangs, Remy’s eyes sought his out, stunning Spencer just slightly with the fact that the man didn’t have his sunglasses on as he always did when he went in public. His only shelter was his bangs. “Dat’s an awfully sad sound y’ made, cher.”

Spencer found he wasn’t really surprised at all that Remy had followed him here. A part of him had expected it, actually. Remy never could leave well enough alone. “I was just thinking about things, that’s all.”

“An findin’ a way t’ make it all y’r fault, I bet. Y’ always was good at dat.” Remy said dryly.

He dropped his gaze down to his mug and shrugged one shoulder negligently. What exactly was he supposed to say? He was saved from answering by their waitress coming to the table. While Remy placed his own order for coffee, Spencer chewed at his bottom lip and tried to think of what to say. He waited until the woman was gone before he blurted out “I’m sorry.” Heat filled his cheeks. He couldn’t bring himself to look up from studying his mug. “I overreacted back there. I never should’ve yelled at you and I definitely shouldn’t have shoved you.”

The table stayed silent for a moment. Their waitress returned with Remy’s cup of coffee and neither man spoke to each other while she was there. But once she was gone, Remy surprised Spencer by reaching over and capturing one of his hands. He gave it a warm squeeze. “Y’ wasn’t wrong, cher. Y’ had every right t’ be angry wit’ me, and y’ got every right t’ let me know when I do somet’in dat upsets y’. I don’t want y’ keepin’ t’ings like dat t’ y’rself. I’d rather y’ yell at me and give me a lil shove dan lock it all away inside.”

“I don’t like getting angry.” Spencer said.

“ _Je sais_. Y’ never have.” Pushing his mug off to the side, Remy brought his other hand up as well and cupped Spencer's one hand between his. “ _Je suis désolé_ , Spencer. I know I upset y’. Y’ was right t’ be, too. It’s just…sometimes, when I look at y’, I still see de boy y’ used t’ be instead of de man y’ are now. An de boy y’ was back den didn’t like violence. Dat boy didn’t even want t’ let me teach him t’ use a gun fo’ self-defense at home. When I look at y’ now, I got a hard time remembering dat y’r not dat boy no more. Y’r grown up. Y’ know how t’ use a gun now an how t’ defend y’rself.” He ran his thumb over Spencer's knuckles and bent down to press a kiss there, making his young partner flush. “I can’t promise t’ never do it again, _mais_ I can promise t’ try better t’ remember.”

Oh, man. Spencer looked up through the hair that had fallen in his face and found Remy’s steady gaze watching him. Hearing Remy’s explanation, he couldn’t hold on to even the last little remnants of his temper. What the man said was true. Spencer had never been the violent type. Remy had tried to teach him to at least handle a gun back then, saying that if someone came in the loft it would be a good idea if Spencer could help defend them if need be, and he’d always refused. In the end, it hadn’t mattered. A gun wouldn’t have helped him that day. He pushed those thoughts away and focused back here on the present. He chose his next words with care, wanting to get them right. “You aren’t entirely wrong in your assessment. I’m still not fond of violence as the answer; I’ve simply learned that there are times that it is called for. I may carry a gun, but I’m not the most talented at shooting it and I will do everything possible to avoid having to even draw it. I’m also not a fighter.” A bit of red crept back into his cheeks. “I had quite a bit of trouble at the physical aspect of things in the Academy. They ultimately had to make exceptions to allow me into the field.”

“Was that cause y’ had trouble learnin’, or cause y’ couldn’t stand t’ have people’s hands on y’?”

The blunt question made Spencer flinch. His gaze dropped down and away and he instinctively tried to tug his hand free. Remy didn’t let him.

“Dat’s what I thought.” Remy murmured. He lifted Spencer's hand and pressed another kiss against the knuckles. “Penny, when y’ went t’ de Academy, y’ was barely healed up after everyt’in. Of course y’ didn’t want dem touchin’ y’. Y’ always have been shy bout bein’ touched anyways.” His voice changed a little, turned just slightly hesitant. “If y’ want, once we’re back home, I could show y’ a few t’ings.”

“I’m not really built for that kind of thing, Rem.” Spencer demurred.

“I bet y’ll do a hell of a lot better dan y’r over dere t’inkin y’ will. _Mais_ , I aint meanin’ dat I want t’ try and turn y’ int’ a fighter. I was just offerin’ t’ show y’ some basic self-defense, dat’s all. Enough t’ give y’ a lil more confidence. Y’ don’t have t’, though. It’s just an offer.”

Spencer shrugged one shoulder noncommittally. He tipped his head back up a little and looked past the bit of hair that had fallen down in his way. With his free hand, he tucked it back behind his ear. “So, ah…we, we’re okay, right?”

The nervous words made Remy smile warmly at him. His beautiful eyes glowed with the warmth that Spencer loved to see. “ _Oui, mon cœur._ We’re _bien_.” He twisted their joined hands so that he could lace their fingers together. “We’ll always be _bien_. _Je t’aime,_ m’ Penny.”

“I love you too.” And so long as they remembered that, Spencer had a feeling that Remy was right; they would always be okay.

* * *

The next few days passed by enjoyably for both men. However, both were aware that they were getting closer and closer to the end of their trip, and there were still quite a few things left that they hadn’t hashed out. Things that needed to be brought up. Their plans for going home needed to be cemented, for one. They had discussed it pretty well before but Spencer knew they needed to talk about it once more and make sure that each one knew what exactly the plan was. He was too detail oriented to just leave it as it was. They needed to discuss living arrangements as well. Where was Spencer going to stay? Did Remy want to move back in together and, if so, where did he want to live? Those were vital questions.

There was one other thing that needed to be done before they left. One thing that Spencer had sworn to himself he would do while they were here. He was going to tear down that final barrier between them and go that final, physical step with his partner. It was something that he wanted to do and something that he _had_ to do. It was vital to him that it happen before they went home. While they were here on what could almost be called a honeymoon of sorts, he had to take that step. Part of Spencer simply wanted that physical intimacy that he had denied himself for so many years now. Deep down inside, though, a small little voice said that he had to do this before they went home so he would know, before he made any huge alterations in his life, whether or not Remy would be able to even stomach the sight of him. He needed to know if Remy could bear to touch him and if he could handle being touched without panicking.

He put it off, telling himself that he would do it their last night there, a sort of symbolic thing. In reality, he wanted to absorb as much time with Remy as possible on the off chance that this proved to break them. Spencer threw himself into their last few days together. He absorbed everything that he could and committed each moment to memory to be able to pull out later if he needed. It was the moments that meant the most to him, not the location they were in. Even going to the Eiffel Tower wasn’t as thrilling as it once would’ve been. Spencer was focused totally on his partner. Remy’s smiles, his laughs, his gentle teasing and his warm touch. He took Remy to a small little theater that they found, just for the joy of watching him. Moment after moment, Spencer built these memories, that little scared part of him whispering always that this might be all he got. That this could all be over.

Too soon, it was their final evening in Paris. They were due to take a flight out the next day and finally return home. Remy had grand plans for that night, Spencer knew. Though he wouldn’t say what they were, he had taken Spencer to get fitted for a suit for the night as that was one article of clothing Spencer definitely hadn’t had in his go-bag.

When it came time to get ready, they separated, Spencer dressing in the main room while Remy showered and changed in the bathroom.

Spencer stood at the window by the balcony and stared out into the slowly darkening sky while he waited for his partner to join him. His head and his heart were warring away inside of him. The rational side of him fighting against his fears. On one hand, he knew that Remy loved him. He could see it in every look the man gave him. He could feel it in his touch. There were countless ways that Remy showed him each and every day. Yet Spencer's fears reminded him that he had felt the same way once before and it hadn’t stopped Remy from leaving him then. Once, he’d thought nothing could separate them. Remy had proved him wrong. Would that fear always sit with him, now? Would he always be watching and wondering if this was going to be the thing that pushed Remy away again? That was no way to build a relationship.

The sound of footsteps had Spencer pushing back his worries and fears. Tonight, he would focus on the moment, not on the future. Otherwise, he would never make it through the night.

When Remy walked out of the bedroom, looking at him proved the perfect distraction. Spencer found that he couldn’t look away. A hum of appreciation buzzed in his throat. Remy had dressed to kill tonight. He was in black boots, black suit pants, a blood red shirt with a black silk vest over it, and he’d topped it off with a black leather trench coat. Damn if the man wasn’t making a deliberate statement tonight. His hair was loose, too, and for the moment he wore no sunglasses. Spencer looked him over and felt the heat start in his stomach. Remy had dressed in an outfit that was designed solely to push every one of Spencer's buttons. The red shirt was the color Spencer so loved on him, everything was tailored to fit, and the black leather trench took it from being a typical classy look and gave it a Remy flair.

As Spencer looked Remy over, Remy was doing the same in return. Spencer wasn’t the only one appreciating the view. “ _Merde,_ Spencer. Y’ look good enough t’ eat.” Remy murmured appreciatively. His heated gaze ran over Spencer's outfit, a three piece suit in all black except for the tie, which was a red to match Remy’s shirt. He also had on a black fedora with a matching red band tied around it.

Spencer ran his hands nervously down the front of the suit. “The lady at the store insisted it was a good look. I trusted to her expertise in picking out the suit. She seemed rather sure of herself.”

“She did a damn good job. I almost feel like I should go change jus’ t’ do y’ justice.”

Spencer rolled his eyes, though his cheeks held a hint of pink. Hoping that his nerves didn’t show, he focused on Remy. That was easy enough to do. He strolled over towards him. When he got close, he reached out and tucked a bit of Remy’s hair behind his ear, loving the fact that it was hanging free. “Don’t be absurd.” He finally answered. “You look amazing, as always. You’ll be the center of attention no matter where we go.” There was nothing but honesty in his voice. The words were true; Remy always drew eyes wherever he went, no matter what he was wearing. He was one of those people that could dress in rags and still people would find him attractive.

It amused him to watch Remy’s chin come up as the man preened underneath the compliment. Some things would never change. Spencer chuckled and shook his head. “Vain little peacock.”

“ _Oui_.” Remy agreed, without hesitation. “ _Mais,_ y’ love me anyways.”

That brought Spencer's flush back, much to his embarrassment and Remy’s delight. He kept his voice teasing, though. It felt good just to talk and tease. “I can’t help it. You’ve rather grown on me.”

“Grown on y’?” Remy smiled and threaded his hand through Spencer's arm. Together, the two made their way out of the hotel room. “Don’t quite know dat I like dat. Makes me sound like a fungus or somet’in. Grown on y’. Tsch.” He clicked his tongue and shook his head.

Laughter tickled Spencer's throat. “A fungus? All the symbolic things that you could’ve chosen from and you settle on fungi?”

“Exactly! It aint romantic at all!”

They continued their playful banter all the way downstairs and through the car ride over to the restaurant. Remy had hired the same car and driver that they’d used the other day to take them tonight. Not that he was telling Spencer where they were going. He knew the fanciness of the place didn’t matter to Spencer in the least bit. Honestly, it was something Remy loved about Spencer. You could take him to a cheap little diner or a five star restaurant, it didn’t matter to him. What mattered was the quality of the food and the company. He just didn’t need the finer things in life. Still, Remy had made them reservations at one of the finer restaurants here in Paris. He’d had to make the reservation the day he’d booked their trip just to be sure that he could get them in. It was well worth it, though.

Spencer had to admit that this place was gorgeous. He and Remy were escorted to a private, secluded table in a section of the restaurant that had low lighting and candles scattered here and there for ambiance. Everything was set perfectly for a romantic evening. No one even flinched at seeing two men here to enjoy it, either. To men who were obviously here for the romance, not for business or anything of that sort. Spencer looked around the place and smiled softly at the beauty here. “They really know how to set the mood here, don’t they?” Nothing beat out the window beside them, though. It gave a perfect view of Paris at night, the Eiffel Tower clearly lit for them to see. “And the view is beautiful.”

“ _Oui,_ it is.” Remy murmured.

A quick glance showed that it wasn’t the window that Remy was looking at. Spencer flushed and dropped his gaze down to the menu he was supposed to be looking at.

Dinner was wonderful. Conversation always flowed easily for them and tonight was no different. Their usual talk was underscored with a little more flirting than normal, though, and these little flares of heat. Spencer kept thinking about his plans for later on tonight and he couldn’t help the twin darts of fear and excitement he would feel. It kept him on edge all night long. By the time the two of them left the restaurant, Spencer was just a bundle of mixed emotions. He knew that Remy could feel it and he was grateful to his partner for not saying a word about it.

Spencer fully expected that they would head back to the hotel now. He was completely surprised when the car pulled up somewhere else. One look out the window had his eyes going wide. His inner nerves and fears were forgotten for a moment as he turned an incredulous look to Remy. The Cajun grinned at him and held up two tickets in one hand. Spencer could just make out the words ‘ _Tristan und Isolde’_ written on them. “The Opera?” Spencer couldn’t keep the shock out of his voice. “You brought me to the Opera?”

“ _Oui_.” Remy’s smile turned a little teasing, though it still retained that smugness around the edges. “Anyone asks, though, y’ dragged m’ ass here.”

“Absolutely.” Spencer agreed swiftly. He could feel his own smile growing wider and wider. Impulsively, he caught Remy’s face between his hands and leaned in, capturing him for a kiss full of all the love he could pour into it. When they pulled apart, he was still smiling and Remy had a slightly dazed look on his face that pleased Spencer immensely. Grabbing his lover’s hand, Spencer opened the car door and hurried to climb out, tugging Remy along with him. Remy couldn’t stop grinning the whole way in.

* * *

It was no real surprise when they settled in their seats that Spencer was talking his ear off. He kept up an almost constant stream of commentary while they waited for the show to start. But once it started, he fell silent and lost himself in the performance in front of him. It was absolutely wonderful. The whole thing held Spencer's attention from the first moment until the very last. He was so caught up in it that he never even noticed that Remy spent almost the entire time watching him. Remy had obtained tickets for this solely because he knew that Spencer would love it. He’d been the one to take Spencer to his very first opera, and to his first theater performance as well, and he had never forgotten the awe and wonder on the young man’s face. Spencer had enjoyed it with that innocence that Remy loved. He’d been almost like a child, totally enraptured with what he was witnessing. That joy hadn’t changed. It almost glowed from him now as he watched. Remy was perfectly content to sit at his side and watch his love.

When it was done and over, Spencer carried that quiet feeling of awe with him. He loved going to the opera. If done well, it was more than just a performance to him. To get the right notes, to play their part right, most good performers throw themselves into the role, taking on the emotions of the moment. Even though those emotions were a mere shadow of what they would be if it were real, they were enough to catch Spencer up just as much as the performance, sweeping him away. He was left with this awed sort of peace inside of him.

That peace stayed with him most of the way back to the hotel. Curled up against Remy in the back of the car, it was easy to just hold on to that peace, to relax and ride the high of the night. Remy’s arm was up around his shoulders and he was tucked in against the warm weight of his partner’s side. The love that Remy felt was out there in the open for Spencer to feel. It wrapped around him too. Not a burning blaze as it could be, but more like a warm winter coat that fit perfectly, custom made just for him, and left him feeling warm and sheltered from the cold of the rest of the world. It chased away the chill of some of his earlier fears and left him with the certainty that no matter how hard things were tonight, they were going to be okay. It would all end up being okay.

Neither man seemed inclined to talk for the whole ride back. It wasn’t until they were upstairs and walking into their suite that either one seemed to find their voice. Spencer was the one to speak up, his soft voice full of love. “I had an absolutely wonderful time tonight, Remy.”

Setting his key card down on the table, Remy turned around to smile at him. He waited until Spencer had shut the door behind him before catching his hand and drawing him in. “Dat was m’ goal, _bébé_. I wanted y’ t’ have a night t’ remember.” With a devilish grin, he curled one arm around Spencer's waist and then caught his other hand. He took a quick step back and then twirled them to the left just for the pleasure of watching Spencer's expression warm. “Paris, it’s de city of _amour_ , and y’r _mon amour._ Y’r _mon cœur._ I wanted t’ make y’ smile.”

Their impromptu dance around the room had Spencer doing just that. His smile was wide as he spun through the steps with Remy, the two of them dodging furniture. The room wasn’t set up for dancing, really. It didn’t stop them, though. Their dance took them around the room and had them both smiling broadly. When they finally stopped near the patio, it was the most natural thing in the world for Spencer to lean in and tip his face up. A low sigh slid through him when Remy bent and captured his lips. The kiss was slow and sweet. It carried the love the two men were feeling in that moment. Remy kept it sweet, not pushing for more. That made it just a little easier for Spencer to take the step that he needed to. Though his fears jangled around in the back of his mind, he shoved them away and made himself focus solely on the here and now. He poured more of himself into their kiss and leaned in a little more. In response, the hand on the small of his back tightened, just a small bit of pressure to help hold his weight just as Spencer had wanted.

The two broke apart and Spencer was pleased to see that Remy was breathing just a little heavier than before. Those damn sunglasses were still on, though. Spencer drew his one arm up, his other hand still clasped in Remy’s, and he pulled the sunglasses out of the way, tossing them negligently over his shoulder. There, much better. The heat of those red and black eyes sent an answering heat coiling through Spencer's middle. He moved his hand to the back of Remy’s neck and caught him, drawing him in once more. This time their kiss was a bit more heated. Spencer tried not to think of anything but the hard body that was pressed up against his. At one time, he’d known this body so well. He’d spent hours exploring every single inch of it. He’d known every scar, every dip, every curve, every place that could turn Remy off if not careful and the places that could heat him up faster than anything. He’d known all of it. And while time had passed and there were things that had changed, the love Spencer felt and the enjoyment he gained out of his partner hadn’t diminished in the least. If anything, it had grown.

He and Remy broke their hold on each other’s hands, reaching for one another at the same time. Spencer's arms ended up around Remy’s neck while one of Remy’s hands stayed in the small of Spencer's back and the other settled down over his hip. This was it, Spencer's mind told him. This was the moment. There was no more time for second guessing. No turning back. He gathered all the courage that he possessed. Breaking their kiss, he looked up into Remy’s eyes and focused on the love and the lust there, using those to give him the courage to say his next words. “Take me to bed, Remy.”

The lust in Remy’s eyes flashed hotter and brighter for a moment. He stared down at Spencer for one long breath and then his lips curved and he nodded. Bless him, he didn’t ask Spencer if he was sure, didn’t try to ask him anything at all, and Spencer was extremely grateful for that. He didn’t want to have to answer questions. Right now, he doubted he could handle them. Maybe later he would find it in him to be able to talk about this, though he doubted it. Talking about what he felt was difficult for him; more so if it involved sex. He’d much rather let his actions speak for him.

The two never fully broke apart as they crossed that short distance to the bedroom. But once they were inside, they had to step apart for just a moment. Spencer took care of closing the door while Remy took care of the lights. He didn’t turn on the overhead light, instead opting to open up the big curtains first to let the natural moonlight in. Spencer watched and knew what Remy was doing. He was offering Spencer the small security of a barely lit room, though they both knew that Remy saw well in the dark. He was giving Spencer the psychological comfort of the semi-darkness in the hopes that it would ease the young man’s mind enough to relax for this. It was a sweet gesture and it made Spencer want to smile. But it wasn’t what he needed tonight. Very deliberately he strolled over to the light switch for the room and turned the lights on, though he left the dimmer switch on low. It bathed the room in a low light that would grant them sight while still being easy on the eyes.

He stood there for a moment, facing the wall. Just a moment so that he could gather his courage. This was going to be the most difficult part of the night. Here was the one thing he’d been dreading doing from the very first moment he’d realized that they were going to try again. A part of him was absolutely terrified of what was going to happen next. How was Remy going to react to this? Would he be disgusted by the sight? Would he turn away from him? Or would he see those marks and feel that guilt all over again and decide that maybe this wasn’t worth doing? That last fear was the most likely one and it was the one that plagued Spencer the most. He was terrified that Remy would see those scars and be reminded of why he’d left in the first place.

There was no point in guessing. The time for guesses and worries was done with. Spencer dug deep and hold tightly to his courage as he made himself turn around. Remy stood in the middle of the room, watching and waiting, those gorgeous eyes of his firmly locked on Spencer with that look that the young genius had only ever seen on Remy. A look that made him feel like the most beautiful, most loved person in the world. A look that said that Remy saw no one else but him. That familiar look heated him just as it always did and it pushed away some of his nerves. Locked in that gaze, Spencer said not a word. With shaking hands he reached up and drew his jacket off. He took a few steps forward and tossed his jacket over the back of a chair.

When his hands reached for the buttons of his vest, Remy spoke for the first time since they’d come in here. “Don’t.”

Fear clenched at Spencer's gut. Was Remy rethinking this already?

Remy closed the small distance between them in just a few steps. He reached up and caught Spencer's wrists, drawing them down and away from his vest. All the while his eyes stayed on Spencer's. “Let me.” Remy’s voice had dropped to a low, husky sort of purr that had Spencer shivering. It had always been one of his favorite sounds. He couldn’t move, not even when Remy drew his hands to his sides and then let go. All he could do was stand there and watch his partner’s face while Remy’s hands came back up to slowly start undoing the buttons to Spencer's vest. “I’ve been wantin’ t’ unwrap y’ all night. Y’ look absolutely sinful t’night, _mon cœur_.”

Spencer's mouth felt dry. He licked his lips and tried to get some moisture in there. The heat of Remy’s voice, his hands, they were burning him up. But underneath it all the fear still ran strong and thick. It held back as Remy slid his vest from him, as the tie was undone and even as his cuffs were unbuttoned. But when Remy’s hand touched that first shirt button, it roared back to life. Spencer's hands clenched convulsively at his sides and Remy froze. He locked his eyes on Spencer. There was so much love there, so much lust, it seared straight down to Spencer's soul. Neither man moved for a long moment. Spencer knew in that moment that Remy would wait if he had to. If Spencer said stop, the man would do just that. He would let this go at Spencer's pace. Knowing that, Spencer did the only thing he could. He gave a small nod to let Remy know to continue.

Their eyes stayed locked as Remy slipped each button free. Neither commented on the tremors that ran over Spencer from head to toe. They said nothing about how tense he became. Spencer stayed focused on Remy’s eyes to keep him anchored as he felt the last of the buttons undone. There was a soft tug as his shirt was pulled free from his slacks and then the coolness of the air brushed against him when his shirt was gently pushed off of his shoulders and down his arms until it slipped silently down to the ground.

For a minute they both held their pose. Spencer couldn’t have moved if his life depended on it. This was it. This was the moment. There was no going back now. For the first time in six years he was standing shirtless in front of someone who wasn’t a doctor. He was deliberately bearing his body to be seen by the one person whose opinion mattered the most. Spencer's heart was beating so hard he swore it was echoing around them. If Remy turned away from him after this, if he saw disgust or pity in his eyes, it would shatter him in ways he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to recover from. He held himself perfectly still and watched as Remy’s eyes finally broke their stare and slowly dropped down to get their first view of Spencer's chest.

Remy held nothing back in his eyes. They showed ever emotion as they passed through him. The pain and shock hit first and it hit Spencer as well. Remy made a soft, aching little sound that was like a fist to Spencer's gut. Hearing it was almost too much. Spencer's eyes drifted closed and he held himself stiffly, waiting for the rejection he was so sure was coming. Grief, fear and self-loathing built in his gut and started to spread.

He startled when he felt light fingers suddenly brush over his chest. His eyes shot open. One long-fingered hand was lightly brushing over his chest. Remy’s touch went up to his shoulder and traced over the scars with a feather-light touch, following the line of them downwards to where they disappeared into the top of Spencer's pants. The scars stood out strongly against Spencer's pale skin. They were wider than one would think, but they were smooth lines. Spencer remembered the feeling of those claws as they cut through his skin like melted butter.

Remy traced back upwards, sending a shiver over Spencer's skin. Remy’s skin looked so tanned against the paleness of his. Fleetingly Spencer thought of Beauty and the Beast and he had to hold back a laugh that would’ve been far too hysterical for his tastes.

Those fingers didn’t stop when they reached his shoulder. They curled around to the back of his neck and slipped into his hair. There they gripped lightly and tugged, forcing Spencer to tip his head up, though he hadn’t realized he’d bowed it. It forced him to meet Remy stare for stare once more. His body trembled and his stomach clenched in fear at what he might see. What he found had him freezing in place. There was no disgust in Remy’s expression. No anger. No condemnation. All that was there was a love that filled Spencer's heart to overflowing and an understanding that was almost his undoing. “Y’r beautiful.” Remy swore huskily. His other hand settled on the bite scar on Spencer's hip, fingers tracing there, teasing against his skin. “Absolutely beautiful, _mon amour_.”

“No,” Spencer tried to protest.

A soft kiss silenced him. Remy pulled back, leaving their lips just a breath apart. “Y’r beautiful t’ me, scars and all. Let me show y, cher. Let me show y’ just how beautiful y’ are t’ me.” He kissed Spencer again and drew him back, over to the bed. His lips kept up their sensual assault as he turned and backed Spencer into the bed. Spencer pulled back when he felt the bed against his legs. His brain felt like it had melted. He didn’t even think of protest when Remy helped him to climb back and lay out on the bed. He arranged himself there while Remy pulled his shoes off and dropped them down to the side. Then Remy was shedding his own coat and toeing off his shoes as well. As soon as those were done, he was climbing up onto the bed, his one hand finding that space on Spencer's hip once more. Spencer tried to find words to express what was in him right then. He tried to think of something to say, anything, but it was as if his ability to form words had been lost. They’d become lost somewhere in that burning heat glowing in Remy’s eyes.

Remy had no words either, yet his actions spoke louder than anything. With lips and hands and tongue and teeth he mapped his way over Spencer's chest. He traced over each scar, giving little cat-licks and nips that had Spencer gasping and twisting underneath him. There was no way that Spencer could hold on to his fears and doubts when Remy was set on frying his brain cells. There was no room for pain between them tonight. Even when Remy’s tongue flicked across the nipple that had been damaged by the claw, Spencer's unease only surfaced for one brief second. Then it was burned away by the heat of that talented mouth as Remy suckled and nipped at the marred flesh.

He left no scar untouched, untasted. When he was done, he wanted Spencer to have no doubts that he loved every inch of him, scars and all.

His plan worked a little better than he’d intended. Six years with only his own hand for company had left one hell of a hunger inside of Spencer. With his fears pushed away, that hunger reared up and took him. He grabbed Remy’s head firmly and pulled him up to seal their lips together in a hard, hot kiss. Then, when Remy started to melt against him, he gave a great heave of their bodies and rolled tem until their positions were switched. He broke free and looked down into Remy’s surprised face. The corners of Spencer's lips quirked up in a devilish smile that only Remy had ever seen. “My turn.”

Remy had been sure that he was going to have to start from scratch with Spencer. He’d been so sure that they would have to take it slow in here, work at getting the young man comfortable in himself and in their lovemaking once more. He had never expected _this_. Spencer's hands were all over him, relieving him of his own clothes, and Remy was definitely happy to assist. He sat up to shed the layers and to pull the undershirt up over his head. When Spencer planted a hand firmly in his chest and pressed him back into the bed, he gladly went. No, he sure hadn’t expected this little firecracker above him, but he wasn’t dumb enough to protest it. Hell no! That mouth that could spout facts and statistics like there was no tomorrow was now setting out to drive him mad. Spencer tasted him like he was a starving man at a buffet. He hit all of Remy’s hot spots, pushing his lust higher and higher.

Quick hands never stopped moving even as he kept tasting. Spencer's tongue twisted around Remy’s belly button while he deftly unhooked belt and slacks both. He moved his lips over to the tattoo on Remy’s hip, the set of cards, and he traced every line of it with his tongue until Remy was moaning loudly above him. Hands were twined in his hair, not restraining or directing him, simply adding that connection. It distracted Remy enough that he didn’t realize just how much Spencer's clever fingers had been doing at his buckle until they slipped down inside. He swore roundly and arched up into the light touch that brushed over his aching length. “ _Merde,_ Spencer!”

A soft laugh drifted up from near his hip. Wrapping his fingers around Remy’s length, Spencer kept his grip as he slid up the man’s body, stopping only when they were face to face. “Yes?” He asked teasingly, his hand not moving at all, just holding there.

Remy’s grip tightened in Spencer's hair and he used that to pull him in for a kiss. The heat in the both grew a little higher and they both knew that, for this first time, waiting and teasing was no longer an option. There was too much between them. Too much heat, too much time. The both of them were craving this connection. Maybe later they would go slow and sweet. Maybe later, Spencer's shyness might reassert itself a little. There was no telling. But here, now, they couldn’t wait any more. They didn’t want to wait anymore. Hands moved quickly, burning across skin as they set to strip one another of their last vestiges of clothing. They ended with Spencer once more on his back in the middle of the bed, with Remy stretched out full length over top of him.

From somewhere nearby Remy produced a bottle of lube. Spencer heard the top pop and he let his legs fall open wantonly and without shame. How could he feel any shame or embarrassment when Remy was kneeling over him and staring down at him like he was the most beautiful thing on the planet? How could he even think about worrying about his looks when he felt that first, slick finger tracing around the entrance to his body, teasing him with that intimate contact? They may have been rushing so far, but on this Remy would never rush. He gently prepared Spencer, never rushing no matter how Spencer writhed and twisted his body in silent supplication. Remy took his time and enjoyed the view as he did. “Look at y’.” Remy murmured as he slid in another finger. “Look at y’ just comin’ alive, cher. I thought y’d be scared, dat y’d be more self-conscious, but y’ want dis so badly, don’t y’? It’s been too long fo’ y’. Too long since y’ was touched like dis. Y’r body’s just achin’ fo’ it. Achin’ fo’ me.”

The usually verbal Spencer couldn’t make a single word form. He could only moan as yet another finger slid in, stretching him. Even the burn of that fullness felt good to him right now. Never had he wanted, _needed_ , so badly. He couldn’t find the voice to beg for what he needed, so he tried to let his body speak for him. He let his legs fall open further and he pushed down against Remy’s hand while his fists clenched down into the bedding. He was rewarded with a low moan from Remy and a twist of those fingers that put them in just the right spot. Spencer shouted out his pleasure while stars exploded behind his eyes. Then he was moaning at the loss as the talented fingers slipped free.

“Shh, _mon cœur._ Shh. I got y’.” Remy promised.

There was the sound of plastic tearing and then Remy was rolling him, moving Spencer onto his side. Spencer tried to voice a protest—he wanted to _see_!—but Remy shushed and soothed him with gentle strokes. “It’s been too long, cher. Dis’ll be easier on y’. Shh, jus’ let me take care of y’.” He slid a hand over Spencer's thigh and drew that leg up, opening him up. Then he was there, just barely pressing against the entrance to Spencer's body, and Spencer moaned. He grabbed hold of the arm that was banded across his chest and gripped it while pushing his hips backwards, begging for more. Remy kept him still, though. He kept Spencer's hunger from causing him to take more than he could. No matter what, no matter how heated they were, Remy couldn’t hurt him. He pushed in slowly and carefully, pausing when he felt Spencer tense, waiting for him to relax before pushing in a little more. It was Heaven and Hell for them both. Remy had his head bowed, forehead pressed against the back of Spencer's neck, eyes clenched with the effort to not just push straight into that molten heat.

When he was finally in as far as he could go, both men were panting, their bodies already slicked with sweat. Spencer held perfectly still in Remy’s arms and waited for the ache to fade away to the pleasure he knew was coming. He gasped lightly when Remy gave a little testing push. Rocking his hips back, he let him know that he was ready.

It was so much better than he remembered. Remy started with little teasing thrusts, giving them both time to adjust to this, slowly working Spencer back up to the heated frenzy he was in before, until they were both rocking quickly and Spencer was clutching at Remy’s arm once more. The fire that had been in them before was nothing compared to this heat. It was burning him alive from the inside out. The air was filled with the sounds of their passion as their bodies strained towards that final completion. Skin against skin, moans that turned to cries, panting breaths. They clung to one another and strained towards that final peak. The heat built and built in them until they swore they were burning alive. In those final moments, bodies pressed as close as can be, their powers opened as well in an act even more intimate than what their bodies were doing. Remy’s charm wrapped around them both, his passion to high to contain it, and Spencer's minimal empathy was almost overloaded by the input from all the skin to skin contact. The deluge of emotions was too much for Spencer to take. Remy thrust in one last time and hit that place deep inside of him and Spencer's whole body shattered into thousands of little pieces.

He felt Remy groan behind him and could only lay there as his lover thrust a few more times before burying his face in Spencer's hair and letting go with a low groan that vibrated through them both. Solid, heavy weight collapsed against Spencer's back, half on him and half against him, pinning him down, and that was just how Spencer wanted it.

Remy was the first one to move. Though neither wanted, he had to slip free so he could dispose of the condom. Spencer moaned lowly at the empty feeling. In no time, Remy was back, surprising Spencer with the small pack of baby wipes in his hand. Remy saw his look and chuckled. “Always be prepared, _mon amour_.”

With those, it only took a quick moment for them both to be cleaned up. Then Spencer got exactly what he wanted. Remy curled back up behind him once more, one arm acting as a pillow for Spencer while the other arm wrapped over him and against his chest. Remy flung a leg over as well so that Spencer was securely pinned against him. It was exactly what the young genius wanted. He sighed with contentment. All these days spent worrying about this one night and it had turned out so much more perfect than he could’ve ever planned for it to be. Capturing Remy’s hand, he drew it up and pressed a kiss against the center of his palm. “I love you.”

“ _Je t’aime aussi_.” Remy murmured into his hair.

The two lay like that, slowly drifting without actually falling asleep. Spencer felt safe, loved and cherished in Remy’s embrace. Looking inside of himself, he realized something and it made him smile. Remy must’ve felt his mood change because he nuzzled at Spencer's neck and murmured, “What’s up, cher?”

“I’m not afraid anymore.” Spencer said the words with no small amount of wonder.

“Hm?”

Curling his hand over Remy’s, he led their joined hands against his heart. He couldn’t seem to stop smiling. “A part of me has been afraid. Wondering if this or that was going to be the thing that pushed you away this time. I’ve been afraid that I’d say or do something that would end with you walking away again.”

A bit of tension slipped into Remy’s body. “Spencer,”

He cut Remy off before he could continue in that aching voice. “I’m not afraid anymore.” He repeated. Feeling more at peace than he had for so very long, he snuggled in closer. A small yawn slipped free and his eyes drifted closed. “Know why?”

“Why is dat, cher?”

“Cause I wouldn’t let you go this time.” Another yawn slipped out and Spencer felt the warm fuzziness of sleep calling to him. His body relaxed against Remy’s and his voice took on a sleepy edge to it. “Last time, you left and I didn’t fight. I was just as much to blame as you. But this time, I won’t let you go. You try and leave and I’ll fight for you. Even if I have to hunt you down, I’m not letting you go again.”

He felt the soft rumble in the body behind him that told him Remy was chuckling. A kiss was pressed against his hair and the arms around him tightened. “Y’ hold on as tight as y’ want, _mon cœur_. I’ll be holdin’ on jus’ as tightly.”

Spencer's lips curved in a relaxed smile. He was still smiling as he slipped down into sleep.

 


End file.
